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So around two months ago, I let go of one of my extremely toxic and emotionally abusive childhood friendships. We were both roommates in college last year, but this year I decided to move away from him into an apartment with mutual friends. I basically told him that I felt like our relationship was unhealthy and that it was causing me anxiety, and that I felt uncomfortable. However, I’m afraid that he may come into the apartment / be invited over by our mutual friends, and at the moment I still get physically and mentally really uncomfortable and fearful around him. Is there any tactful way of letting my current apartment mates know my concerns without causing drama? My whole point is that I don’t want to see him again especially anywhere in the proximity of my living space. I’m fine with them meeting outside the apartment, but I just don’t want to walk into my apartment one day after class and see him sitting in my living room.
Any advice would be really appreciated. thank you
Hi ryan,
If they’re your friends, what you’re asking won’t be that big a deal. It’s not like the ex friend is inviting himself over! Just say (in guy speak): “For the dude’s saftey, don’t bring him over here because I don’t tolerate azzes in my space! BTW, he’s an azz.”
If you do find him sitting there, lead him by the elbow to “show him something outside”. When he leaves the apartment, you stay in, and slam the door and lock it. Your friends will be all, “OMG, he’s serious!” and the toxic friend will be made a fool of and won’t visit anymore.
OK, Good Luck!
Inky
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