Imagine for a second that each person’s faith is like a different language, individually different to each single person(no one ever feels their own faith in the same way, and no one would ever translate the dogma of religion in the same way either). Some people may equate the word “gay” with “hell” and others equate the word “gay” with “love”. If they’re your family, and they equate the word “gay” with “hell” then they probably also do so in order to communicate “love” in some roundabout way(thinking that by warning you of what they fear about hell, they are showing their own kind of love).
Eventually, all that should matter in ‘coming out’ is that you feel this love for your self, independent of anyone. So let that love you feel for yourself guide you, and no matter what people think or say, your heart will remain strong, on a path between all these imagined constructs of heaven and hell, all that truly matters is love. Love yourself, and those that truly matter and understand, will follow.