Hi Anita,

You didn’t know your nephew was there. You let go once you realized he was there. You did the right thing.

Things happen between siblings. I don’t believe for a second that you intended to make your sister stop breathing. You were just angry and wanted to scare her. That’s what I believe. When I was a kid my brother (probably 22 at the time) punched another brother (maybe 16). Loud screaming and blood everywhere! Not fun to watch as a youngster. I remember crying and wondering if anyone was going to die. But no one did. It all worked out. And this is the first time I’ve thought about it in many, many years. What I remember most is how younger brother said some outrageous, hurtful things to older brother until older brother lost his cool. And older brother isn’t a monster, not by a long shot. He’s a loving husband and father who got really mad at his brother many years ago and made a mistake, one time. And younger brother isn’t a monster either. He was lost at that time in his life, getting into trouble all the time, picking fights with people.

As for leaving your nephew when he was crying, I know you wish you had made a better choice, but as Oprah says, “When you know better you do better”. So now you know better. And you apologized. You did the right thing again.

Lori