Dear Brittany:

Your last sentence is “Love is a choice, not an emotion.” Well, love involves choices and in a loving relationship we do not automatically react to emotions when such reaction is harmful to us and to the one we love. But love involves LOTS of emotions and to ignore this fact is to ignore reality. You, Brittany, are not a Saint, a non human saint who can detach from any inconvenient, a bit messy emotion and be the perfect loving entity.

Naturally you want to be the only love object in this guy’s life. Naturally you are and will be worried when he visits the other girl. Naturally you are not going to be okay, peaceful and okay with him choosing her. You are probably going to be angry with him.

You can not take YOU out of the equation. You are very much involved. I think it is a good idea to not be engaged with him sexually as he didn’t make HIS choice yet. If I was you, I wouldn’t be sexually involved with him until he definitely and unequivocally make the choice = and the choice is YOU.

If I was you I would detach myself as much as I can from this guy, make the possibility that he is not available to you as REAL as you can make it and proceed with caution.

And it is not about her, it is about him. It is not up to her, it is up to him regarding what happens at Christmas.

anita