Thank you for the responses, everyone.

Anita,

I apologize if I was not engaging in conversation with you. I do appreciate the time you take to respond and would like to look deeper into the issue.

Yes, there has been a pattern where men come on very strong and interested for several months and then withdraw. I remember us talking about how I may be acting needy and co-dependent and driving them away. In several relationships, I feel this may have been the case. In my current relationship though I’ve made a concerted effort to not make the relationship my only priority. Of course, it’s important to me and I put forth effort, but I’ve also made an effort to pursue my interests and make plans with my friends.

Deep down, I feel him withdrawing is more a personal issue for him than a reflection of how I’ve acted. He keeps reiterating that “I’m perfect,” “I’m kind,” “I take an interest in his culture and family,” “I ask him about his hobbies,” etc…

Honestly, he seems to be a major “sayer” and not a “doer.” This is an example of a text he recently sent me (in between his periods of withdrawing)…and yes, I’m typing this out word-for-word:

“You make me feel soooo good! You’re my favorite! I’m truly happy you’re my girlfriend! I’d do anything for you! I’ll be by your side through anything! I’m truly blessed to have you in my life! :)”

And then I don’t hear from him after our phone conversation or all day and almost an entire day passes and he still doesn’t respond to a text I send him. I think he WANTS to feel these things for me, but I don’t think he actually does. If he did, then I don’t think it would be an issue to communicate with me and if he really loved me…then I don’t think it’d be an issue to tell me again after the first initial time he said it.

I’m feeling so frustrated right now. I don’t believe his behavior will change and it’ll only bring me more hurt and confusion if I stay.