That makes sense.

Because I am so much younger than my sister, our relationship didnt really start to blossom until recently. When she was 18 I was 8, so I more looked up to her instead of looking to her as an equal and someone I could talk to on an equal level.

We had our struggles in my house having a sick father. Having a sick person living with you is hard in ways I could not even begin to explain, and it definitely takes a toll on everyone.

I think that is why this is such a struggle for me. My dad, one of the strongest people I know, was so closely defeated by this disease. He once told me he was suicidal. I dont want my sister to get to that point. It terrifies me.

My dad once asked me what he had to live for. It’s such a scary question to hear from someone you respect and admire so greatly.

My sister and I are now closer. My parents have become shells of who they once were. They still run around trying to be there for all of us, but after years of being sick and years of taking care of someone whos sick, you change. They are not the same. So my siblings and I now turn to each other for support.