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Is it me?

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  • March 12, 2016 at 3:36 am #98794
    EndlessSearch
    Participant

    Hi all,
    Im 28 and as I look around I find myself alone and comfortable. I’m NOT ok with these feelings. I suffer with severe anxiety and am just naturally awkward. I have excelled in one profession and decided that money wasn’t worth my happiness. The answer was to sell everything I own, quit my career of 6 years, and take off around the world. Half way through my 4 month trip the same feelings came rushing back. I now find myself climbing another corporate ladder and it feels like I am on a hamster wheel of sorts. I cant decide if I am blocking everybody out because of my own issues or am I just driven to do the best at everything i do to the point that everything else falls to the way side. I am an “extreme” person in the sense that when I do something I always give 120% and usually succeed in leaps and bounds. Why is this not converting to other aspects of my life?
    Thank you so much for reading.

    March 12, 2016 at 7:51 am #98807
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear EndlessSearch:

    This is my attempt at answering your question with the information in your one post above:

    You do not succeed in other aspects of your life even though you always give 120% is because the fear in you (anxiety= ongoing, excess fear) is also giving you 120% of itself.

    What do you think of this answer?

    anita

    March 12, 2016 at 8:20 am #98810
    TorangeTafi
    Participant

    You’re anxiety might be playing into your need to succeed. If it’s failure you are afraid, you really need to learn to become more comfortable in your skin. Don’t readily accept new opportunities, instead let them hang in the air for a bit(a few seconds at best). Let yourself be confronted with anxiousness until it is fully acknowledged, then accept it and make your decision.

    Start prioritizing other things once you are more comfortable doing so. Have any hobbies?

    March 12, 2016 at 9:05 am #98813
    EndlessSearch
    Participant

    Dear Anita,
    I can agree that the fear of not living up to expectations set forth by society as a whole has hindered me. It’s a constant battle between what I think I should be doing and what I want to do. This is with everything, including things as trivial as what’s for dinner! I’m so confused with things and think I need to be more readily able to just go with what I want. I’m not sure if any of this makes sense, first time I’ve reached out for advice on any of this and feel good to have willing ears to listen. Thanks!

    March 12, 2016 at 9:52 am #98817
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear EndlessSearch:

    Your battle is between what you think you should be doing (fulfilling society’s expectations) and what you want to do.

    This is a common battle. In your case, it is a very distressing battle. You can explore it here, if you’d like, find that which you are looking for: an end to this battle. Is that what you are looking for?

    anita

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