Posts by Trina Stutzman

Trina Stutzman is not a guru on a mountaintop, but a guide by your side who empowers individuals to stop lying and tell the truth. She is a recovering people-pleaser who uses her mess to convey a message that the world needs YOU, not some other version of you. She is an author who wrote the book,12 Steps to Overcome People-Pleasing. She is a self-proclaimed Midwife of the Soul and Holistic Life Coach. You could contact her via her website.

Trina Stutzman's Website

Why People-Pleasers Lie and What We Gain When We Share Our Truth

“You’re a liar. People-pleasers are liars,” a friend said to me. I felt like I was punched in the gut. “You say yes when you mean no. You say it’s okay when it’s not okay.” My friend challenged me, “In your gentle way, begin to be more honest.”

I believed the lie that pleasing people would make my relationships better. It didn’t.

I decided to take my friend’s challenge to tell the truth. People didn’t have a relationship with me; they had a relationship with another version of someone else. They didn’t know me.

People-pleasing was safe; it was how …