The Power of Acceptance: Stop Resisting and Find the Lesson

“Of course there is no formula for success except, perhaps, an unconditional acceptance of life and what it brings.” ~Arthur Rubinstein

Sometimes you’re an observer of other people’s lives and you think you’ll never experience what they’re living, whether it's a positive or negative situation. You think, “That will never happen to me.”

Part of the real beauty of life is that it’s unpredictable. Nothing is permanent, everything changes; and of course, a lot of things can happen that will transform who you are and have an impact on your life. The problem is that we need to cultivate the ability to truly accept whatever comes and embrace it.

We need to develop the habit of looking at whatever happens through a positive mindset instead of a negative, defeatist one.

Of course, life will bring many challenges, such as the death of someone we love, and it’s not easy to embrace them when we’re suffering and wishing those things would have never happened. But if we start cultivating acceptance in our lives right now, we’ll likely cope with future crises in a different way and view them from a different perspective. We will accept instead or resisting.

I am big fan of Deepak’s Chopra’s The 7 Laws of Spiritual Success. He dedicates one complete chapter (Law #4) to how we need to receive with open arms what happens to us, because if we fight and resist it, we are generating a lot of turbulence in our minds.

He explains that we might want things to be different in the future, but in the present moment we need to accept things as they are. That’s the way you can make your life flow smoothly instead of roughly.

During the last year of my life I have learned the true power of acceptance.

The first lesson I learned was last year when my boyfriend broke up with me after three years together. Even though I was reluctant to believe he wouldn’t give me a second chance during the initial months, I eventually realized I had no option but to accept his choice and move on with my life.

I discovered that I was happier and more peaceful when I accepted what had happened instead of constantly fighting to change things.  

Recently life has presented another challenge to me.

I met someone a few months ago, and even though it was clear from the beginning that nothing could ever happen between us, love found its way through. I couldn’t help feeling something deep and real for him. I allowed myself to give into the feeling, even though my mind was screaming to get out—and fast.

I have to accept things as they are, and right now we cannot be together for many reasons. There may be hope down the road; maybe someday things might work out. But right now, in this moment, that’s impossible. I have chosen to accept that fully.

Yes, acceptance is a choice—a hard one most definitely, but a choice nonetheless.

There are two ways out of a problem: accept what’s happening, see the positive, and choose a peaceful state of mind; or fight against it, be miserable, and struggle against the universe.

Even though my two examples are related to love and relationships, I am 100 percent positive that learning to accept things as they present themselves is a helpful tool in all aspects of life.

Whether it’s a family loss, a missed opportunity, or a sudden change in your plans, being able to accept things that are out of your control will help you maintain inner peace and happiness.

Acceptance, in my opinion, is the key to convert momentary happiness to enduring happiness. It helps you move from feeling happy to actually being happy.

Practicing acceptance prepares you to live in this changing world, where you never know what’s going to happen next. Acceptance is like protecting yourself with your own shield.

Let me clarify that acceptance is not at all related to weakness, and is definitely not a synonym of conformity or mediocrity.

We need to learn how to identify when it’s time to persist and when it’s time to accept.

One thing that makes acceptance much easier is to list all the possible explanations for why you’re experiencing something.

For example, I know I met this person to help him go through a very difficult moment in his life. He needed me. He needed to be heard, to be understood. And I was there for him in those ways. I fulfilled a purpose.

Finding the lesson or purpose behind every challenge will help you embrace it instead of fighting it.

Choose not to judge what happens to you. Instead, believe that everything happens for a reason and that better things will always follow. That’s the beginning of true acceptance.

Somewhere recently I read that the important thing is not to understand why something happened. Our understanding can wait, but our obedience cannot.

I translate this to mean that when something unpredictable happens, instead of complaining and over-thinking it, we need to choose to live with it.

I know it’s hard to practice acceptance when you deeply wish things were different. But the truth is, sometimes we can’t change our reality, even if we try.

So instead of staring at the closed door in front of us, or getting tired and bruised while we try to break it down, let’s turn around and see how many other windows we have open.

Photo by h.koppdelaey

About The Blog

Want more Tiny Buddha? Follow on Twitter, Facebook, and Google+, and don't forget to subscribe to Tiny Buddha to receive free daily or weekly emails!

See a typo, an inaccuracy, or something offensive? Please contact us so we can fix it!
  • Nidia Dalmeida

    Thank you a lot for this article. My father waz recently shot by a robber, but it got his leg. I spend 2 months trying to understand why that happened, specially to someone that did no harm to no one.
    After trying to decipher the whys and whats i found myself submerged in rage and quams of revenge. It did me no good, it actually poisened my mind and behaviour towards others.
    Lately i have been accepting that things happens as they should and there is nothing we can do about it. We must accept and move on taking lessons and experiences out of it.
    It is no walk in the park, but the reward is worthy.
    Great piece and thank you once again.

  • This resonates so much with me.  It’s all so true, and acceptance is the way I strive to go through life.  There are lessons everywhere.  Truly, though, I still find this hard, and often have to remind myself to let go of my white-knuckle grip on how I wanted it to be.  xo

  • Jjvandeberg

    phenomenal!!  Thank you so much for putting this our there!!  You have captured the essence of what makes buddhist philosophies so profound in very clear concise prose!!
    Well said!!

  • Guest

    what if acceptance makes you appear less of a person? if you have been ripped off by someone, or stabbed in the back by a family member, are you saying that acceptance is the only way forward? i hear this alot, but i cant see how you can happily accept it.. someone walking around knowing what they have done to me and having to accept and embrace it… i dont see the logic in it, it makes me feel like a walkover, or a doormat to all that goes on around me.

  • Em

    I probably lost the whole point here, but isn’t accepting and not choosing to fight for something defeatist?

  • Guest

    Thats what i was trying to say… 🙂

  • Antparty

    Wow. This really resonates with me today. A relationship that had high promise ended suddenly last November and I’ve been swimming in misery ever since. I’m seeking counseling and it’s helping, but it really is a day to day struggle to accept it. I have a rather powerful little ego that’s clinging to hope. I can see that I helped her through a difficult situation, but the fact that she ended it has left me in great pain. It’s been 8 months and I just haven’t let go of it. I see the car she drives every time I got out and I have tried to say “she ended it” when it do, but it’s to little relief. Anyhow, it is a day to day thing and I’m working hard to accept that it’s over. It ain’t easy. 🙂

  • Anaruth_sm

    Thank you very much for reading and giving feedback =) , Ana.

  • Anaruth_sm

    I understand, it can sound contradictory and it can sound as if you are a pushover. The thing is not to take everything so literally or to an extreme. Of course you can fight to depend yourself, and never remain quiet, you have to use your voice and speak up! I am talking about an acceptance when things can’t be changed at all. When something happens that’s out of your control, like a death of someone, or when someone sbreaks up with you. You need to think you give everything that was in your power, and that your persisted enough. Now you need to accept. Also, please note that you cannot control other people behaviour, but you can control how you react to it. So I am advising here that instead of fighting and resisting them, just accept it and move forward.

  • Anaruth_sm

    Hi Nidia, thanks for your comment! I think the way you handled that difficult situation is great. Sometimes we cannot understand why things happened, and we cannot go back to change the past. So it’s healthier and smarter to accept it. Hope your dad is better. My best wishes and prayers go to you and your family.

  • Cin

    Thank you for this. After the death of two very important people and the betrayal of a man I loved and believed would support me through that difficult time last year, I too struggled with acceptance and finding happiness. Now that I am on the cusp of it, this article feels like the final push I needed. Life does get better, but only if you let it 🙂

  • A2010girl

    I absolutely LOVE reading your posts.  Especially this one – I CAN RELATE to SO MUCH.
    Please proceed cautiously with your new love.  I too fell for a man who was dealing with problems and he asked me to “See this through” with him.  He is a DELTA Airline pilot who lives in Greenville South Carolina, an I lived across country in Cali.  He even often used the term
    Cali to Carolina

    We started out as friends I too had my guard up, like you, wasnt looking for anything more but as time went on, we grew closer and he said things to me that melted my heart.  The only and the ONLY reason I gave this a chance was because he was an airline pilot and could fly across country ( and did often) as eaily as you and I run to the market.
    Anyway after finding many many truths because of the obscure behaviors I have had to block him from my phone and txt message. 

    JUST BE CAREFUL is all I am trying to say to you. 

    What I finally did….. after many freinds and family
    Listen to your gut, if things dont add up, start reading on sociopaths and narcisist.

    Now after 4 years, I see that actions express more than words.  $ Thousands of dollars loaned ( THOUSANDS) My family and friends are relieved I have cut the ties. Eventually, recently, one of his own family said to me – “Think carefully before you take him back”
    Love you and your inspirational post.

  • Lauries34

    Acceptance does not mean that you like it, agree with it, or wanted it….it is simply the act of accepting it, it is the way it is, and when you accept it and not fight it, you will feel more peace.

  • Guest

    Thank you for this, I have been going through the exact same situation as the second example you listed, I try to remind myself, when the impossibility of it chaffs and hurts, that he and I are providing lessons for each other at this time. Thank you for helping to reinforce the mindset that I have to accept what comes for what its worth and make the best of the life I have.

  • Anaruth_sm

    So true! That’s the whole point of the article =)

  • Anaruth_sm

    Thanks for sharing your story, I am so glad the article helped you! It is very difficult to accept when a relationship doesn’t have a future or it’s likely to fail. It’s difficult sometimes not to trust your gut when your heart is loving that person so much. But in the end the ACTIONS speak louder than words and intentions. You need to be smart enough to notice his behaviour. I have accepted fully that me and this person won’t be together for many reasons. And I am at peace! It’s incredible! When you don’t resist and don’t fight so much, you live more happy =)  I am glad everything turned out ok for you. Let’s be smart the next time we meet someone =)

  • Andrew

    It is always amazing when you read something and there are some parts that apply directly to your own life situation. In this instance, the love that could never be but happened anyways. I was in denial for so long, but now am starting to accept that it truly can never be for many reasons. As you stated, it is extremely difficult, but as human beings it’s something we all must learn how to do and this is the positive that has come out of what has been a devastating situation for me. There have been better days in life, there will be better days in life.

  • Anaruth_sm

    Hi! Thanks for writing! You have no idea how much I relate to your story. I’ve been there, and recently! It’s painful, sometimes it’s exhausting just to try and try to feel better and forget about the person you loved. But you know what? TIME is all you need. Give it more time. Never give up hope, give it time! Even if 8 months have passed, don’t worry, eventually you will heal. The trick is to never never give up. I think it will help you a lot to keep thinking that this wasn’t your decision, it was hers. So you have nothing to regret! You did everything you could! You cannot control other people’s behaviours and choices! I think there is great amount of freedom when you realize the end of the relationshio didn’t depend on you.  I recommend reading a lot about dealing with break ups, it helped me a lot! You can’t even imagine how reading about this helps you heal faster. The most important thing right now is your own serenity and inner peace. Once you have achieved that, the rest of the healing process will come faster. Trust me. Be at peace, this wasn’t your choice, it was hers! =)

  • annabelle

    Perhaps I am misunderstanding something, but this does not read like full acceptance to me – “I have to accept things as they are, and right now we cannot be together for many reasons. There may be hope down the road; maybe someday things might work out, but right now, in this moment, that’s impossible. I have chosen to accept that fully.” – it sounds either clinging to hope or denial, but waiting for fate to determine the outcome. Where there are many good points that I take to heart in this piece, failure to learn how to identify, respond and react; ultimately will lead to reoccuring feelings of failure or frustration – that now have the added step of accepting.

  • Anaruth_sm

    I totally agree! We can overcome even the hardest things, but we need to try! We cannot to give in to negative emotions.

  • Anaruth_sm

    Thank you for your words. I am glad to hear this helped you. =)

  • Anaruth_sm

    And always trust that there is someone better forus out there =)

  • Anaruth_sm

    It might sound a little contradictory. My point is that RIGHT NOW, I need to accept things as there are. You never know what can happen in the future. Nothing in this life is permanent, everything changes. And maybe someday you can have what you desire, but if today you can’t, you need to let it go and accept that right now you can’t have what you want. It’s about accepting what is happening right now.

  • gradstudent520

    While I don’t believe that everything happens for a reason, the rest of the article really resonated with me. I’ve been going through a similar “impossible love.” When I heard those voices in my mind telling me to get out, I chose to stay in. I chose to let happiness in, knowing it would be temporary, that there could never be a future. And now, I’m faced with accepting a reality without that person. But, I love your conclusion that we have to start looking for open windows, rather than beating ourselves against closed doors. 

  • Kaye

     Hope for the future and acceptance of the present are not mutually exclusive.

  • Good Post.

  • whiterabbit

    I really like this post and I read it twice because I also have been learning to accept things as the way is it by stopping thinking why why why and trying all kinds to get my relationship with my husband better (although we dont have any crisis in our relationship, just that our reality doesnt match with each other anymore) and then I found peace in my head, my body could rest and my soul thanked me for making a right decision.

  • Joel

    Thank you, your post hit home. I too have been trying to deal with the fall out of an impossible love. It has been nearly unbearable since I’ve taken the steps to distance myself from her so after deciding to start over in a new town I’ve been able to start accepting and forgiving. I feel like I have a long way to go but I always seem to find posts here like this to give me that bump when I need it.

  • Anaruth_sm

    Hi Joel! It’s great to hear you are making progress. Acceptance sometimes takes time, but the key is to believe that you need to ACCEPT the situation.

  • Anaruth_sm

    I think your situation and mine are the same. So I am glad you read the post and liked it. I know it’s hard not to be with the person you love, but I truly believe there is a hidden lesson or purpose behind every situation. We might not understand right now why we are not meant to be together, but you will eventually. I recently read this quote: “One day someone will walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anybody else”

  • Caleenr

    I too just ended an “impossible love” at 50 years old, I thought I had learned all the lessons from past relationships, but I had never had an experience like this, I too knew from the get go that it was not going to work for many many reasons, there were way too many obstacles, distance being one of them, but he having very deep mental issues and no job or home.  But despite the obstacles we fell in love, finally, after 6 months, I had to tell him to leave, well he left alright,,,all the way across the country, and I was crushed.  Its been 2 months and I am still deeply hurt, I struggle every day not to email him, even though we have been off and on, but it just hurts.  I have to let go, and reading these similiar stories helps.   I too need to learn to trust my gut next time, I knew this would never  work and let myself fall despite my inner voice screaming to get out.   

  • Loved your piece Ana, it is a timely reminder for me to accept and stop trying to row upstream…which I seem to constantly do!   I have written ‘ACCEPTANCE’ on a piece of paper and taped it to my mirror, to remind me.  Thank you for sharing so openly 🙂

  • Mima Michellemary

    I totally relate to this article! I’m in a similar situation as the author and feel that things haven’t fell into place yet (as I would like them) because I had lessons to learn – in fact, I’ve had a lot of lessons to learn about myself that better prepare me to have positive relationships in the future. I will say that when I let things go and not stress or over think about them (which is difficult!) things seem to fall into place and work out much better. I’ve done a lot of work on myself in the last six months and I truly believe that this person was brought into my life to help me finally get rid of some old and negative attitudes and beliefs about myself and life in general. Great article!

  • Forsidney

    It seems to me with thoughts of maybe things will be different in the future and turn out okay, you are not actually letting go – nor you are vesting in a desired outcome – you are just going with the flow… disallowing yourself pleasure, and only taking an temporary asprin for the pain.

  • annabelle

    Exactly! Its the opposite of the Laws of Attraction – if you believe in that stuff.

  • The death of my husband (at the young age of 46) is what inspired me to accept that what happens: good, bad, and everything in between; is exactly what is supposed to happen. Until that day, I fought the forces, determined to make things happen the way I thought they should. After that day I, eventually, learned that the only thing I can control is how I respond, what I’ve learned, and accepting it was meant to be for a reason… even if that reason will never specifically reveal itself to me… that’s okay. 

  • Moonlover62

    Dear Ana S.,
    Someone below made note of this same comment – it is amazing to read your post because I feel it was written just for me! Thank you for taking a difficult situation and making sense of it, as I have not been able to do so myself with my own situation. I do believe you have accepted your current situation, and what especially resonates with me is that you have kept a positive, albeit accepting, outlook. I have experienced some major changes in my life recently; the loss of my job and the loss (for now, anyway) of the love of my life. RIGHT NOW, I have to accept that and begin to move on. I have been fighting with myself about letting go, feeling hurt and playing a million “what ifs” in my mind. I found that I was preventing myself from moving forward with my life. Your article helped me to realize that there is hope, but I do have to accept the present. Like you stated, nothing in this life is permanent, everything changes. That is important for me to remember, and as much as I would wish to acknowledge everything with a cool and collected head, my love relationship can prevent me from doing that at times.Thank you for letting me know that I don’t have to give up my hopes and dreams. I just have to focus on the here and now, and keep my heart open and positive!

  • Paul

    Your timing of a ended relationship is very similar to mine, as are your expressed feelings. Whilst each day seems different sometimes acceptance, sometime dismay, I can only say that time assists. Time allows us to start envisioning another future, aftearll, we still exist today, where we never thought that possible so soon after the end. Ana’s post and comments ‘hope for the future and acceptance of the present are not mutually exclusive’ are useful to understand this. I wish you peace as we seek to find that in ourselves by focusing on what we have learned and how this will allow us to be better to ourselves and others in the future.

  • Gsfraser

    Stop asking:  “Why?” is what I got from this. 

    “Why did God see fit to give me cancer?”  “Why did the Universe think my 4 year old sister (30+years ago) needed to be rapped by a family member?”  “Why did God take the ONLY female (including mom) on earth whom I believed when she said “I love you” and use her to teach me that those words CAN’T – not ever again – be trusted?”

  • Marisa White

     Acceptance of the here and now is difficult because it is natural for us to always look ahead. But the main thing I took from your article is that it is just not normal to not be able to love someone the way you would like to- love comes naturally and easily, even if it’s a not-to-be situation. When you love someone, your soul is complete and open to that love. To have to hide it, push it away, or deny it does not feel good, or natural. Accepting that is the greatest of challenges, and yet, ironically, if you really do love that person it’s what you know you have to do. Thank you for the insight. 

  • Puneet D

    Nice read.. I like that..
    I too have a blog.. 

  • Dee

    Thank you for sharing your deep realisations.

    I can so relate to what you mean.

    I found it easy at the beginning to accept things but as time elapses and nothing “better” comes along its very hard to remain so positive, practically speaking.

    I know deep down there is no limit on the length for which I must suffer and thats despite grabbing new opportunites, its just so frustating when your mind keeps bringing you back to the same point, which makes it tough to totally forget.

    Thank you

  • nader

    something very inspiring!

  • TraceyMc

    This post really hit home for me. My bf of a year and a half just broke up with me, out of the blue…in an email. We had just taken our kids on a vacation together and it went really well. After the trip he told me he loved me more than ever. 2 Weeks later, gone. He has a lot of struggles with his ex wife and she lords over him and never wants anyone else around their daughter. I have no idea what went down, because he won’t give me any answers at all. It is almost like he died, as he will not even speak to me.
    I have been struggling against it for 3 weeks now and stressing myself to the maximum.
    I am working on acceptance now. Thank you.

  • Michael

    I really appreciated this. Thank you.

  • Selina01

    Hi everyone i will never forget the help the priest of JAYEMA temple render to me in my marital life. i have been married for 4 years now and my husband and i love each other very dearly . after 3 years of our marriage my husband suddenly change he was having an affair with a lady outside,i notice it then i was praying for divine intervention the thing became more serious i told my pastor about it we prayed but nothing happen. my husband just came home one day he pick up his things and left me and the kids to his mistress outside at this time i was confuse not knowing what to do again because i have lost my husband and my marriage too. i was just checking my mails in the office when i saw someone sharing her testimony on how the priest of JAYEMA temple help her out with her marital problems so i contacted the email of priest JAYEMA i told him my problem and i was told to be calm that i have come to the right place that i should fill some information concerning my self i did after 30 minus he called me again congratulating me that my problems will be solve within 48 hours. he told me what went wrong with my husband and how it happen.that they will restored my marriage but i will make a free donation to their JAYEMA home anything my heart told me. to my greatest surprise my husband came to my office begging me on his knees that i should find a place in my heart to forgive him i quickly ask him up that i have forgiven him.friends your case is not too hard why don’t you give priest JAYEMA a try they work surprises because i know they will also bring back your husband. contact him via

  • sassifrass

    I believe on some level ihave accepted my fate. I wanted him back when it was too late. Maybe it always was too late I cheated and left him but I couldn’t let go. I am sure this is not real love. I do know however I didn’t appreciate what I had nor did I try to work on it. So in short he has moved on and I am still having trouble letting go. Most of the time I am ok and I get by. Every morning though it still feels like starting all over and I am afraid this will not end for a long time how do I overcome that aspect how doing truly accept and let go..

  • jes

    well said..

  • Grace

    I am going through exactly what you were, how do you feel now since it is two month past?

  • latifer brandy

    During my search on GOOGLE for help to get my ex lover whom will got divorced back, i came across this wonderful man called DR.AGBAZARA of AGBAZARA TEMPLE who did a nice job by helping me to get my divorced husband back within 48hours.. I never believe that such things like this can be possible but now i am a living testimony to it because AGBAZARA TEMPLE actually brought my lover back, If you are having any relationship problems why not contact DR.AGBAZARA TEMPLE via email on: (agbazara@gmail. com) OR call him on (+2348104102662),
    Then i promise you that after 48hours you will have reasons to celebrate like me.

    from USA

  • Kelsey Phillip Payne

    In practicing mindfulness while also making the difference we wish to see in the world, it’s important to make a distinction between (1) acceptance of the things in life we are less likely to be able to change as well as have a lower threshold to seeing change, and (2) “acceptance” of things we still feel desire to change (= have a higher threshold around seeing change) but might give up trying to change because of a perceived impossibility around it.

    This distinction is so important because we might otherwise “accept” those things which we feel less empowered or motivated to change, despite truly wishing they would, and thus do nothing about. An example would be something like climate change. To truly accept the phenomenon of climate change, to me, would be, not to just let it go as it will (the “que sera sera” approach), but to cultivate acceptance around the fact that it is happening (if you agree that it is) without relinquishing my desire to change those factors that are contributing to it.

    The scare quotes I’ve inserted around the word signify the brands of “acceptance” that are actually forms of relinquishing or giving up on those things we love or care about. These forms are typically ones we invest ourselves in when we are actually afraid of losing the things we love (such as a lover, a family member, or the Earth’s biodiversity) and would prefer to protect ourselves from the pain of that loss instead of embrace the entirety of circumstances that include our pain of the loss. This latter form is the truer form of acceptance, in my opinion, because it means accepting the difficulty, accepting our pain around the difficulty, and accepting our desire to change what makes it difficult for us (whether we choose to actually try to change it or not).

    I so understand the pain of loss–I have lost many in my life–and want to acknowledge the preciousness I see in the desire to protect oneself from the pain around changes in one’s life. The tragedy to me is in giving up on what may actually bring us happiness and instead “settling” for a quasi-happiness that is based in the denial of the pain we feel.

    I hope that others receive this comment with understanding and hear the care I feel for anyone who may not otherwise see a distinction between these two connotations (or feel that that distinction is important).

  • Carolyn

    Name Debbie brown, from United Kingdom At the age of 21, I had just ended a 5 year destructive and emotionally abusive relationship. I had lost my first love and I thought my world would end and that I was going to be single forever. I had convinced myself that I wasn’t worthy of any good person and that my fairy tale dream would never come true… 4 years later I met the man of my dreams, love at first sight and totally swept off my feet! The previous 21 years were a blur and my fairy tale began… 3 years later – I am happily married to a gem of a husband with a beautiful baby girl… All of a sudden a woman came into the question and took my man all the story started again but this time i decided to fight for what was time and was not ready to let go of my man and the father of my daughter. on this faithful day on one of my adventures on the internet i saw the contact of Prophet Vicky contacted him and i am happy to say after 48 hrs my man came back and its been a years plus now and we have been living happily just using this testimony to say a big thank you and to also give out the contact of Prophet Vicky which are : E mail

  • Carolyn

    Hello I am Joy Micheal ,I am out here to spreed this good news to the entire world on how I got my ex lover back.I was going crazy when my love left me for another girl last month, But when i meet a friend that introduce me to Dr Favour, the great messenger to the oracle that he serve,I narrated my problem to Dr Favour, about how my ex love left me and also how i needed to get a job in a very big company.He only said to me that i have come to the right place were i will be getting my heart desire without any side effect.He told me what i need to do,After it was been done,In the next 2 days,My love called me on the phone and was saying sorry for living me before now and also in the next one week after my love called me to be pleading for forgiveness,I was called for interview in my desired company were i needed to work as the managing director..I am so happy and overwhelmed that i have to tell this to the entire world to contact Dr Favour at the following email address and get all your problem solve..No problem is too big for him to solve..Contact him direct on: and get your problems solve like me….. ONCE AGAIN HIS EMAIL ADDRESS IS:

  • your new dentist

    no one shares

  • your new dentist

    And no one cares

  • A gay Man

    Why are you posting about your life? No one really cares what you think or who you are! Go back to africa you slave.

  • A gay Man

    What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch. I’ll have you know my name is John, and I woke up this morning 5:30 sharp to the smell of wet pussy. I was getting a blowjob from two bitches (Shit was SO Cash), one was trying to fit my humongous 3 pound balls in her mouth while the other was choking halfway on my 18 and 38 inch dick. She started to squirt hard, she was convulsing and having 6 orgasms at the same time. I gave it to them and they were on the floor squirting like motherfucking fountains. Must have come about a quart of sperm and compressed air. Imagine your best orgasm, then multiply it by 35. I had to go to base camp so I front-flipped from my 14th floor barracks into my valet parked 2012 Ferrari (I got connexions). Pushed my shit to about 4 hundo (mph, mind you) and I was at base camp in no time. When I entered, I became a top sniper and was granted access to the entire arsenal of the USMC. I learned how to kill someone in over 700 different ways and was assigned to be the leader of a squad that will kill 300 terrorists using gorilla warfare tactics. Also did 6000 push-ups, 8000 sit-ups and bench-pressed 30 plates in 16 minutes. After basic training, I met a network of secret spies who will help me trace your IP address, while eating gold plated sushi and 15,000 $ champagne. My unit got the rest of the day off and I became captain of our base’s football team and starter of the basketball team. I got straight A’s on the military entrance exams and received more awards. Meanwhile, you were jacking off to pictures on Facebook and naked drawn Japanese people. Went back in the Lambo to my barracks and now I am getting ready to go to sleep. I am going to graduate at the top of my class in the Navy Seals tomorrow and I want to look pretty much perfect for it. Don’t be a stranger and remember, I did more in one day than you will your entire life.

  • Perrine


    I’m having a very hard time accepting … Change in relationships. I can’t accept the fact that one day he might leave me; and might find someone else. I can’t accept that one day he might live his life with someone else, and that is not me.

    Even though our current relationship is going amazingly well; I can’t help but think about what might happen in the future, and that if that happens … How can I accept that.

    My question is; how do you accept the fact that the one you love may never love you? How can you accept such uncertainty and have so much faith? How can you accept in general?

    Thank you for your honest answer;
    I’m … Sort of freaking out right now.

  • Roland Jane

    Join the great Illuminate to be rich,famous and. wealthy .for
    on how to become a member kindly fill the following
    informations below.
    Full name…..
    You are to take the oath and made an agreement that you will
    never betrayed the Brotherhood,because no going back after
    filling the form!!Our Oath is this: if i ever try to disclosed this
    secret out to any body or betrayed the society,you are to reply
    this message along with the details you fill…let me die with the
    sword of the Lucifer .you are expected to say this after filling
    hurry up now and make
    contact with us today ayokospellcasterJoin the great Illuminate to be rich,famous and. wealthy .for
    on how to become a member kindly fill the following
    informations below.
    Full name…..
    You are to take the oath and made an agreement that you will
    never betrayed the Brotherhood,because no going back after
    filling the form!!Our Oath is this: if i ever try to disclosed this
    secret out to any body or betrayed the society,you are to reply
    this message along with the details you fill…let me die with the
    sword of the Lucifer .you are expected to say this after filling
    hurry up now and make
    contact with us today
    yours forever!! feel free to join us. riches are
    yours forever!!

    our call +2347055620537

  • Sam

    What if someone is raping a girl in front of my eyes. Do i accept the situation?

  • Hi Sam,

    Since this an older post and the author may not see your comment, I thought I would come in. I believe the author is talking about accepting our circumstances instead of resisting what is and what’s happened–not standing by idly in the face of a crime.

    The former is about choosing not to deny reality; the latter is about responding compassionately to what’s happening.


  • Zeel Shah

    Beautiful Post. Its true that only when you accept what it is, will life get the chance to show you the brighter side. There is light at the end of the tunnel, but you can’t reach the end directly. you have to go through it. that itself is an experience. & Time heals everything. You just have to be willing enough to give time a chance to show its magic.

  • charles

    this last two years has been horribleI had a relationship for twenty three and a half years I had to leave the woman I was involved with didn’t love me anymore my grandson got cancer at 17in 2012 brain cancer tumor I went to see him I had go to Las Vegasthat’s when my girlfriend of 23 and a half years decided she was going to live without meI took very little just my clothes and my tools my motorcycle my car got an apartment that I should be grateful for my grandson died 2014 I started gratitude training before that my source of income endedI’m really messed up

  • Magdalini Fragkiskatou

    Acceptance is nothing more than the peace that comes from handling the responsibility of your life to the universe and pretend you are whoever others and the circumstances make you to be. It is expremely convenient with Lazy people, Cowardly people and people who do not want to use their brains and their experiences to shape themselves, ( Stupid people). It is so peaceful to pretend you are a beautiful single leaf taking a ride on the wind. It is very convenient to people who were born in slavery so that they accept their chains and it is such a sweet concept to people who own slaves as the slaves will be content with their lot and won’t do any unpredictable things. It is the Wisdom of Sheep, I wonder who pretends to be the shephard here.


    Spiritually deficient. Period. There is no positive or negative in acceptance. It’s the way it is. This piece may be harmful for people seeking guidance on true acceptance.

  • slone

    Hello Perrine.

    Maybe the first thing you need to do is to try to accept that you are having a paranoia about it. And also accepting what happened to you in the past that have caused you the fear of the unknown.

    You are obsessing about “what might happen” because you haven’t accepted your fears yet. And that is fear of being abandoned… it’s difficult. But you need to feel the struggle and fear. You have to identify all those fears. Those experiences. Sometimes our fears boils down to our “worth” that we are unloved and unappreciated.

    You need to shout and tell the truth. What is the truth? What are your fears? Feel the pain and suffering and hug yourself. Maybe its time to let go… and just try to accept what is.

    My uncle once said:
    “You can live as if everything is not a miracle, or you can live as if everything is a miracle.”

    Cherish every micromoments, because the truth is.. we can never be certain if we will live again for tomorrow.

    ~ slone

  • Angelina Scott

    Am from England, Oxford,UK …HIV has been ongoing in my family for long..I lost both parents to HIV and it is so much pain has not been able to get over. As we all know medically, there is no solution or cure for HIV and the cost for Medication is very expensive. Someone introduced me to a man (Native Medical Practitioner) in oxford. I showed the man all my Tests and Results and I told him have already diagnosed with HIV and have spent thousands of dollars on medication. I said I will like to try him cause someone introduced me to him. He asked me sorts of questions and I answered him correctly. To cut the story short, He gave me some medicinal soaps and some herbs(have forgot the name he called them) and he thought me how am going to use them all. At first I was skeptical but I just gave it a try. I was on his Medication for 2 weeks and I used all the soaps and herbs according to his prescription. That he will finish the rest himself. And I called him 3 days after, I arrived and I told him what is the next thing he said, he has been expecting my call. He told me to visit my doctor for another test. Honestly speaking, i never believe all he was saying until after the test when my doctor mention the statement that am, HIV negative and the doctor started asking me how do I do it….Am telling this story in case anyone may need this man’s help. He is the Great Dr Odi here is via email address ( or call +234811531558
    Thanks Regard….

  • Julie

    I love what you have written my god it sounded as though I had written it about my own life. I am going through that same recent situation and it has left me broken, temporarily broken but I hold onto the knowing that I’m embarking on a new chapter full of good. I know I’m healing I know it takes time part of that healing has come from acceptance. It’s hard to practice acceptance but it does come. Loved the quote at the end of the last post yes one day someone will walk into my life……. Thank you xx

  • Julie

    Huh…… how do you accept that your 23 year old son got angry with his baby and shook him? How do you accept that he’s going to prison for 20 years? How do you accept that you’ll be 80 years old when you see him free again? How do you accept not letting him see you on yoru death bed because you dont want him to see you this way? I’m not getting it.

  • sweetpea

    It sounds like you are a co-dependent in need of counseling. Love is about sacrifice, not getting your needs met. God can meet your needs, so stop worshipping a fat statue and seek the one true God. The find a healthy counselor to unravel your co-depencency issues.

  • Matt Davis

    It’s the judgement of “turn out ok” that causes the problem. It presumes that things are “not ok” right now.

  • Ravindra

    I am suffering from an illness for last 10 years and it is not getting cured inspite of my best efforts. How should I accept it because I have lost my job due to this illness and all friends/family also.

  • Rajat

    Hi Perrine,

    Stop it. You are behaving exactly as my wife of ten years did. She was always scared that I would leave her. And we had a beautiful relationship.. guess what happened in the end? She left me.
    Why? Because at one point she got tired of her own insecurities and figured she did not want a life that is dependent on me. She tells me that she now needs to find her own identity and it has to be without me.
    That leaves me devastated and the reason I am on this page. But please spare yourself and the fellow.

  • heath

    Let’s use an example other than you and your boyfriend. For example, a man works as a janitor. He has for a few years. Whatever. He doesn’t have a nice house or nice car. Women don’t look at him because of his job. No money. Etc. Should he just accept that and get on with being a janitor? Or should he apply to go to school again and get a better education. To get a better job. To build more pride in his life. To achieve things. To step up in the world and make things happen for himself? (To ‘struggle against the world’ and what life ‘gave’ him).
    If you’re not a good thinker and have no experience or real grasp of life, this stuff can be like ‘wow I’m gonna try this’. But inevitably, within certainly a short amount of time anyone who just ‘accepts’ (we could discuss the exact meaning of ‘accepts’ in this context too) what is happening to them and does not struggle against the things that are making them unhappy or holding them down, MUST struggle against those things to change their life for the better. Better being Whatever they belive to be better. And someone can tell them ‘but that’s not better, why are you struggling just accept what you have’.. that’s just an opinion. Who is anyone to tell that person that that is not better? To not strive for what they want in their life. Just accept that you are overweight. Accept that you smoke and can’t stop. Accept that you drink too much and ride your motorbike around drunk, heading towards some hideous accident if you don’t ‘struggle agaisnt’ your alcohol addiction and bad life habits that you created and should uncreate.. not that that is a word.
    Tell the millions poor people living below the poverty line to accept that that is where they should be. Accept it. Smile and breathe and accept that your child is sick and dieing from the flu because you don’t have a dollar to buy simple medicine.
    These examples could go on for years there would be literally millions of scenarios where accepting what the world has given you and not struggling against it is absolute rubbish. Rubbish perpetuated by spoilt, rich westerners confused in some minor hiccup of their life and desperately searching on the Internet for something ideology to cling to for a few weeks until that too fails them.
    And before you say, (it’s the most common, throw away line used in western society today I’m sure) ‘stop being negative, be positive’ that has absolutely nothing to do with any of this. There is negative and there is a sharp brain thinking clearly, differentiating bullshit from something worth listening to and potentially applying in your own life.
    Should a depressed person accept that depression and ly in bed all day? Or should they force themselves (struggle agaisnt life) out of bed and even if it was just pushup on the floor, which would lead to needing a shower, which would lead to them moving, feeling cleaner, hungry after the pushup, sleeping better because they were actually tired from working out. Waking up earlier the next day and rembering that it felt good to move that blood around their body. ‘I’m gonna do that again’. ‘I’m not gonna just accept that I’m depressed. If that is the flow of my life right now, FUCK the flow of my life right now. I’m gonna struggle the fuck agaisnt that and live the beat way I can!’.
    I fully understand what you’ve tried to say here. How you think it has helped you in your life. But accepting that your boyfriend didn’t want you anymore didn’t mean that’s why you are now not together. You were done either way. Better way to see things is learn to see what you can change and can get it to the best of your abilities. Learn to also see what you can not change and have your own coping mechanisms to fall back on like a good routine of exercise and good food. Things that no one can take away from you.

  • Canada’s Future PM

    Unfortunately the idea of always having someone better out there is why no one stays together anymore. Recent studies have found that couples who stay together both believe that there is no one more suitable for them. So if people can’t accept what they have, and work on it, and they choose to go another direction only to be faced with the same lesson they haven’t learned again and again, it’s groundhog day and not acceptance. People who stay in relationships have come up with the idea that the person they are with IS the best that is possible. So believing and having faith that this moment, with person “x” is to be accepted as just that. Thinking there’s something better all the time just around the corner, someone better, something bigger, is just another form of deception to our self, who has everything that we need, all the time. Delay of gratification is one thing to learn, but being able to savour the moment and not worry about something like Mrs or Mr Perfect is just going to distract your mind and body from the perfect mate who’s probably right in front of you already.,

  • kevi

    Hi (name: abc)
    I’m having a very hard time accepting…. 4 years ago, I found a proposal online, he was in other country. We liked each other and decided to marry, although we never met each other. The first wedding date that was fixed was 25th August, just 15 days ago he changed his plan and denied coming to India. He assured he will just marry me and no one else, and from then onwards he just kept on giving the fake wedding dates and until today he never came. Every time he started giving excuses and reasons for postponing the date. I was struggling hard to get out of this relationship, but couldn’t get out and had become very crazy. I was deeply hurt. It was very hard time to accept the fact that he has no interest left in me now. He just had sympathy on me but he didn’t love me. And in those hard time I had to manage professional life and personal life which was very difficult. When I came home after work, it was difficult for me to avoid messaging me. I use to everyday message, and when there was no reply from him then again I would get more deeply hurt. To get out of this then I took a part time job after work hours, so that I can keep myself busy all 19 hours of a day. Later I decided to stop any further messages and block all the numbers. I did so, initially was very difficult but later go out of it and still some day once in a month I remember him but that craze has now faded away.
    But currently I found a new love, I am scared that if I loose this love also? I have lost hope if I will ever get married. When I met this new love I was very excited and overwhelmed, but because of negative talk and fear, that will everything go well, even this relationship is in danger now. All was very perfect, but just few days back something went wrong, that was all because of my fear within inside my heart. Now again I am going crazy and don’t have patience to get things right. I feel that even this proposal will slip from my hands just like the previous one. And just don’t have patience to even give some time to our relationship so that it gets better. I know it might get better, but do not have patience for the day when it gets better.

  • Sharon Brucks

    I have to accept that I have no real value to my immediate family, no matter what I do or how hard I try. I do 90% of the housework, cook dinner every night, do all of the laundry and yardwork, and have recently added working part-time (15-20 hours a week at a restaurant), plus taking the kids back and forth to school, but I am completely ignored unless it involves fulfilling a request. I accept the blame for this. I am lacking whatever that key element is that would result in real value, whatever it is, and I need to accept that in a calm and peaceful way. You can’t make people value or love you, no matter what you do. They either do or don’t. The work is to accept it.

  • Genevieve

    Hi Sharon. The feeling of having no value can be overwhelming, crushing…do your darnedest to ignore that. I know it’s hard. But hang on. YOU have value. YOU are loved. Sometimes (often) it doesn’t show in easy to see ways.

  • Fatma musallam

    how can we do both, accept what we have and try to change it to be better at the same time ?

  • Eric Leclair

    Can you give some “specific” examples of resisting. Something we can relate to in our daily lives. You just hear a lot of ‘just accept it’ or “don’t resist it” from all kinds of ‘self help gurus’ but never something substantial. If you can share some quick specific factual examples, that would be great.

  • Bharati Jadhav

    If you accept something not acceptable you are giving power to it… Law of attraction says even it was bad experience but if your heart says something else then never give up follow your deep down thoughts and feelings …. Ask it from the universe and live with it. Why would one accept that they cannot be together just because they think someone better is waiting for them somewhere ….. While that someone is already front of your eyes you just need to accept it didn’t work with earlier ways but it will certainly work new ways. If you were truly in love it wouldn’t be that difficult to manage the situation have strong will power and high respect for your situation and partner what it is trying to teach you. Learn from it be happy… Even the beautiful moon has eclipse.. it’s life many ups and downs will come but accepting anything and everything won’t make you an extraordinary human in planet.