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Alessa

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Viewing 15 posts - 151 through 165 (of 616 total)
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  • in reply to: Parent Life #449590
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi Roberta

    Thank you for the advise Roberta. A book is a great idea since he loves books and they calm him down. I will try the other techniques you mentioned too. All brilliant suggestions, thank you. ❤️

    Hopefully it is just a phase. He never used to do this as frequently. It was after he got ill most recently. He had to take a lot of medicine very frequently. It upset him taking the medicine. That is what triggered the hitting to worsen.

    Ah so he wants to talk? That makes sense. He hit me the other day when I finished reading a book to him. Then he cried and I asked him what was wrong. He picked up the book again.

    It was only pencils and books there at the class. I think it was just the difficulties of the situation. He definitely was tired, peckish and he did need to poop.

    Yes, I am with him in the classes. They are only 30 minutes. Unfortunately, the sessions are always at the same time in the morning. Since the public hitting started, I’ve been following him around trying to keep an eye on it. Telling him no hitting and taking him away from the other child.

    It is unique because he is in the habit of trying to take toys off other children since he is used to me giving him things I’m holding that he is interested in. I have been trying to practice taking turns with him. ❤️

    He is a good kid and just exploring his boundaries recently. I hope that things improve soon. ❤️

    Do you have any advice for handling the hitting and biting at home too? I really do appreciate your help because I don’t have a family to advise me about these things. ❤️

    in reply to: Parent Life #449589
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi Anita

    Thanks, I found that advice online too. ❤️

    in reply to: Safe and Brave #449588
    Alessa
    Participant

    Copy and pasting cut off the top part which was

    Thanks for the apology Anita. ❤️

    in reply to: Safe and Brave #449587
    Alessa
    Participant

    y Anita. ❤️

    I just want to get some things off my chest because it feels like I haven’t been heard yet.

    It hurt being ignored. I’m a very consistent person. I don’t ignore people.

    It is difficult for me to connect with people who are hot and cold because it never really feels like they are actually interested in sustaining a friendship and have a foot half way out of the door, ready to slam it shut again. ❤️

    I was shocked by some of the comments in both the initial conflict and the most recent one, but what unsettled me the most in the initial conflict was Anita posting about how happy she was whilst we were suffering.

    It also hurt when I was asked for things to stop and I was ignored. I was politely begging for my feelings to be heard and to matter. No. I don’t matter, is what I felt.

    It hurt to witness the conflict on Yana’s thread. I bore the pain as long as I could.

    It hurts me to see what is happening now. Post apology. I don’t have any energy left.

    I’m my own person. People are free and deserve to be heard. ❤️

    It feels tone deaf to try to tell people what they can and can’t do after how we have been treat. What about our feelings? As long as things are handled respectfully and not in a cruel way, I don’t see the problem. ❤️

    in reply to: Compassion and respect during times of conflict #449574
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi Anita

    I don’t mind communicating with you in a different thread. Respectfully, I don’t think it would be fair for people to not be allowed to talk to each other about the difficulties. ❤️

    There are some things that because you were involved in the conflict, you won’t be able to emotionally support them with. People do deserve to be supported. ❤️

    I can understand why it might make you uncomfortable though. I don’t believe it is meant in a bad way. This is just how people process their emotions. ❤️

    Suggesting that it is similar to what you were doing in your journal… it doesn’t feel appropriate or accurate. The two situations are vastly different. The conflict has been long, drawn out and painful. It didn’t have to be that way. It wasn’t our choice for it to be that way. People deserve a chance to heal and not to suffer in silence. ❤️

    in reply to: Ah James, Oh James Poor James #449556
    Alessa
    Participant

    I love that song! 🎶 ❤️

    in reply to: Safe and Brave #449555
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi Anita

    Is there anything you want to say? ❤️

    in reply to: Parent Life #449543
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi Everyone

    Does anyone have any advice for a 2 year old hitting?

    He hits and bites at home when he’s grumpy. And today at his baby class he started doing it with other children. It was very busy and there were a lot of new kids. He has difficulty sharing being an only child and he was hitting when children were trying to take things he was playing with, or when he wanted what they were playing with.

    So embarrassing. 🙈

    ❤️

    in reply to: Ah James, Oh James Poor James #449542
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi James

    Might not be able to escape suffering, but you’re a pretty swell guy! You are appreciated and loved for being you. Just as you are. ❤️

    in reply to: Trying to find a new job #449538
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi Calm Moon

    Yes, it was very healthy and brave of you to leave your previous workplace. I’m sorry to hear that you are worried about your finances. Good luck with your job search, I hope you find something that suits your needs soon! Try to remember to take care of yourself and relax. It sounds like you are doing your best. ❤️

    in reply to: Compassion and respect during times of conflict #449537
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi Tee

    I’m glad to hear that I haven’t hurt you. That would be the last thing I would want to do. ❤️

    I have always struggled with conflict because of my PTSD. I’m a bit better with it now than I used to be. The slightest hint of negativity and I would break down crying in the past and that was if I felt like the person wasn’t doing it intentionally.

    There are some things that I can’t talk about in a public space, but if you would like to email me. I’d be happy to talk about more freely there. I understand if that isn’t something that you’re comfortable with though. ❤️

    in reply to: Anger *trigger warning* SH & SA #449520
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi Anita

    Thanks, I understand ❤️

    in reply to: Feeling misunderstood by extrovert mom #449519
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi Miss Duchess

    I’m sorry to hear that you had a difficult conversation with your mother today. ❤️

    It sounds like she didn’t apologise. I’m sorry that she didn’t help you to feel better. ❤️

    You did a good job trying to talk to her about your feelings. I’m sorry to hear that they were dismissed. ❤️

    in reply to: Compassion and respect during times of conflict #449518
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi Tee

    I worry that I hurt your feelings and made you sad again. ❤️

    I’m sorry for panicking and rushing things. I just wanted to be there from start to finish and I couldn’t cope with any more arguing. ❤️

    I don’t judge you Tee. ❤️

    I can understand your feelings and perspective. ❤️

    I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you feel like your pain is any less valid. I know that you value your resilience. I simply didn’t want to hurt you. ❤️

    in reply to: Compassion and respect during times of conflict #449499
    Alessa
    Participant

    Hi Tee

    I think that I might have some ideas about what you would like to talk about. It was a bit reductive because I was feeling stressed. Not really a nuanced perspective. I’m happy to listen, talk, explain and apologize where needed. Please try not to worry and rest. You remind me of my old therapist whom I was very fond of. ❤️

Viewing 15 posts - 151 through 165 (of 616 total)