Hi Peter

Thank you! ❤️ Your bravery, voice and insight are welcome. 😊

I totally understand. I wasn’t offended. If I wasn’t a parent I would have a much easier time with stress. I would honestly agree with you. ❤️

We do have to work within our circumstances and our capacity though. At the moment, I might struggle. Hopefully, in time things get easier for me again.

I feel like conflict is very complex. One of the things that helped me is understanding myself. It is that old adage again. I had no idea how I can come across to people. It is that story of things that people love about others can end up being something they dislike. For me, my bluntness is not an asset in conflict. And unless you tell people that you care and mean well they might never realise it. A good friend told me.

I don’t think of it as changing myself, just trying my best to be more sensitive in sensitive situations.

It is really hard for people to trust as well during conflict. I have struggled with that a lot. But fears do little to build trust. Sometimes you have to put yourself out there and see what happens, which can be scary. ❤️

I am reminded of a video of a feral kitten that was placed with a foster mother. The kitten was angry, hissing and swiping. The new mother cat slowly and gingerly sat next to it. Not reacting. When the kitten saw that it was safe, it relaxed.

We all are our own unique and special people bringing life to the world. I think our differences make things better. ❤️

I’m sorry to hear that the news is worrying you again. Things are difficult in the world at the moment. Hopefully, things will get better in time. ❤️

Forgiveness is not something that I struggle with anymore fortunately. It took a long time to learn though. In some ways, I’m still learning. The fears are still there during a PTSD episode. I have learned to trust what I have learned when I’m feeling calm instead of accepting the fears as truth. It is not easy to practice ignoring (for lack of better term) fearful thoughts and emotions. Sometimes they can be so strong that they feel true in the moment. I just have to hold onto that things pass in time and only waiting to see will reveal the truth of a situation.

Your message actually helped me to feel calmer. I didn’t necessarily understand it in the moment. But I trust you and know you to be a kind person. I sat with it, trying to understand and thought about it whilst knowing this about you, having your character in mind. Your presence was comforting. ❤️

I don’t want to leave either. I like it here. There are lots of nice people. I think it is a special place. ❤️

Hi Tee

That’s fine, no worries. ❤️

I’m sorry for asking for something. I hope it didn’t upset you? I didn’t assume that you would do something like that. I just really wanted to help make this a safe space. I panicked because of what was happening.

I think you’ve been really helpful and thoughtful. I really appreciate your presence. ❤️

Hi Anita

I appreciate that you can see how these things might be hurtful. ❤️

Unfortunately, it doesn’t really change the way I feel.

I’m not really comfortable with even this level of conflict.

It is stressful and upsetting for me. ❤️

I know you are trying your best. ❤️

Hi Anita

I’m not discussing Brandy.

My point Anita is that this space is supposed to be safe for everyone. Quoting people can be hurtful and embarrassing. On a public forum, there is an element of public shaming. I don’t know how much clearer I can be? ❤️

If I quoted something you had said about me that was hurtful it could embarrass or hurt you. Other people feel shame, hurt and embarrassment too. ❤️

Hi Anita

I appreciate that you are doing your best to try and keep things light? I thought that I was clear before in asking you not to post quotes.

There is a reason that I never do it. Because it is hurtful. You asked recently for your quotes not to be used? I presume because it hurt you?

The difficulty is that on a public forum it can be seen as public shaming.

Can you please stick to the intent of this thread and help this to be a safer place? ❤️

Hi Anita

I appreciate your apology and your willingness to engage in a healthy way. I understand that you are trying your best to learn and adapt right now. ❤️

You were talking to Tee about Brandy suggesting that Brandy might have posted an abusive message. Soliciting Tee’s opinion on her, someone who is not present in this thread and saying that you were going to repost her message. To me, that is gossiping.

You are welcome to try to engage with Brandy or Yana directly on my thread, all I ask is that the nature of thread is honoured and you help to make this a safe and brave space for everyone. It would be helpful to speak to people individually when discussing a conflict. ❤️

I understand that you are hurt by things that were said in the heat of conflict. ❤️