Dear Rachel,

I agree with Anita. I believe a true relationship has peace in it. Obviously there are disagreements, but not as many that you are constantly arguing and in distress.

I am just out of a 24 year-old marriage. It was brilliant at the start, and healthy, loving and supporting in the first 16 years. But once the arguments started we couldn’t have a moment of peace. What was once an interesting point of view suddenly became a pet hate or worse. It took us a lot of courage to call it a day. But I’m glad we did. We had a good marriage, and we did a lot of growing. It was hard to move on, but we did and we are both happy with our choices now.

It took me 8 years of arguing and stressing out to realize I would no longer “fight” for the relationship. Enough was enough.

I used to pray that the best would be done in our lives, be it together or apart. I think that was the best way to wish for the best possible outcome.

Best of luck.

xx

Alex.