Dear Jared,

I am truly sorry that you are feeling all of these feelings at once, since I very much feel the same. My experience with life at the moment is very much the same (albeit our situation is a bit different).

First and foremost, when changes are happening (taking care of a toddler, another child on its way, loss of your job etc) your brain needs to adjust. Human beings don’t like change. Period. But the way your brain is responding worries me a bit. It seems like you are struggling with heaps of anxiety which is not healthy for your mental health at all.

It is good that you do respond positively to the “happy” things in your life. I always find it important to look at the lights around you (no matter how small) in times of darkness. I think it is completely normal to think, and worry, about the things you are worrying about. But I feel like you are overthinking everything to the extreme… which is unhealthy.

It is at least a good thing that you are not in financial distress! Even though, in this economy, many people are hammering on and on about how you need to have a full-time job otherwise you won’t make it. The fact that people make you seem like a failure when you don’t have a job and all that jazz.. Jared, let me tell you buddy, that’s just the government (I am not some crazy conspiracy theorist stay with me on this one). They want you to have a job and a morgage so YOU become their income and they have you pinned down till you go with retirement and you realized you wasted your years away.

Now, whether you agree with me or not, you do not have to have a 9 to 5 job. Ask yourself this: do you want to spend more time with your family or do you want to waste your time with a bunch of strangers wishing you could go home and spend more time with your family? Exactly. Luckily there is such a thing as the internet. And there are many wonderful people on the internet who have been in the same situation as you and they write blogs or do other things and tell you how to live your life a bit more care-free! I honestly suggest googling around. You need to take the pressure of society off your back a bit.

Ehh, I could go on and on but to make it short, I think you have anxiety issues. But fear not! According to the National Institute of Mental Health at least 18% of the adult population of the USA struggles with anxiety. I advice you to talk to a mental health professional. I would suggest a combination of both therapy and medication, and then figure out if they work for you. I don’t think there is much more to it. Whenever a person is overthinking and stressing so much over things it usually means their brain needs some rest. Meditation and yoga could help you as well, as both are very calming, soothing, and relaxing for both brain and body. Also don’t forget to follow a healthy diet and have an appropriate amount of exercise every day as both can aid you through recovery.

I am glad that writing out has helped you, and I hope my response will help you somewhat as well. Also, don’t forget to open up to your wife about this. Ask her to help you through these difficult times. You are married to one another and the husband doesn’t always have to carry all the burdens of the family. If you open up more to her and talk to her about your struggles you will also grow close to one another which is good for the family dynamics!

If you have anything to add to your story or want to talk to a friend you can find my contact information on my profile (I think?) otherwise just leave another message here and I can give you my contact information. If not, then I wish you and your family all the best. I hope things will work out for you!