Thank you for all  your wonderful responses, I really appreciate it.

Anita, you are absolutely correct, I am not totally powerless, but not without difficulties and stress and over the years I have gotten tired of it all. There is only so much a person can handle regardless of how strong they are. All those years of stress has taken a toll on me, as a result I have become sick with frequent headaches, thyroid issues, weight gain etc..I along with my kids deserve so much more. I spent some time alone, just me and my self..meditating and I came to certain realizations, I felt as though I have lost myself. This is not me, I was a person who was into meditation, yoga, spirituality..very strong and healthy and fit individual. I lost myself during those years, caught up in the stresses of married life and dealing with a difficult spouse, a life of fighting and struggle. As I am getting older, I do not want to waste another second of my life like that again. This is not the life I was meant to live for me and my children. It is not possible for me to move out right now, our living situation have changed a bit..still the same house, but I have decided to sleep in another room by myself. It’s only been a few days now, but I feel like a heavy weight has been lifted off my chest, I can breathe well again. I am taking it one step at a time, getting back in touch with my meditation, yoga and diet. I have made a list of things I enjoy doing and plan to follow through with it, I have connected with fellow disciples of my meditation group. It’s a great start and I can only grow from here. I will not give up 🙂