Hi D,

I personally dont consider you an “abuser”. You have trust issues. I completely understand why you would be upset. Being a woman, we see other women as threats, especially our boyfriends exes. He should not lie to you, no matter what the circumstances. There should always be open communication, even if he knows it makes you uneasy. So, please do not think that you’re crazy.

I understand that you love him, but is this what you feel you deserve? Are you able to trust him again? Also, do you know what it is that your boyfriend is saying to his parents that make them “hate” you? My concern is that he’s talking down on you to his parents.

Sometimes being in love clogs our thinking. Do you think thats whats happening here? What is your head telling you to do? Is your heart able to out weigh your head?

Mia,

Thank you for your input. I’m glad you finally found someone that treats you the way you deserve. Our situations like you said is quite different. But, I have to ask you, do you feel as though only having 1 partner since the age of 19 has taken away from your youth? I’m 20 years old, and can see myself with my current boyfriend for the rest of my life. I just don’t want to miss out on opportunities that I could have if I were single. But, I also don’t want to miss out on having a life long love.

I seem to be in the same situation you were in. I have an enormous need to be loved due to a traumatic child hood. Not only do I have an enormous need to be loved, but I also have an enormous need to have someone. At this point in my life, I am not able to be on my own. I dont like being alone with my thoughts. Its almost as if I need someone there to numb my pain. I depend on them for my happiness. So, to answer your question, I guess my fear is being alone. Im only 20 years old, and I realize I have my whole life ahead of me, I guess i just feel as though I should have my life together a little better. I’m worried that I’m going to continue to settle, as long as im not alone.

Thanks for your reply

Ashley.