Maile – in answer to your question – YES!

There are times when I struggle to get the ‘end’ is actually the end so I try and think about each friendship … whether its with a lover/ partner, or a girlfriend, or a family member … that each friendship is a painting, or a sculpture, or some other arts medium that fits our relationship – I have one friendship that’s like stand-up comedy at the pub – all booze and one liners!

Anyway, when I’m in a relationship I imagine our interactions are us creating something that is an expression of our feelings, personality, circumstances and time of life, and (importantly) that we’re doing this together. We show each other all the things we’re good at, what we’ve learnt or are learning, what’s beautiful, funny and sad about us, and how all these aspects of ourselves fit together to create something that’s each of us but different because it’s BOTH of us!

Sometimes we’re busy putting pieces in place – sending texts, having coffee, ‘catching up’ – sometimes we’re off gathering new pieces of information as possible contributions to our creation, sometimes we have to have that serious discussion about what we’re creating because it doesn’t look/ feel ‘right’ … and sometimes … well, sometimes I notice I’m the only one contributing to the picture. As soon as I realise that, I ask myself, “Is what we’ve created complete?” Do I need to keep adding texts, emails and pictures to something that is actually a finished work of art and ready for display in the gallery of my life??

Maile, the hardest thing to learn is when to stop working on something, especially if when we’ve had so much fun and it’s been a wonderful experience. Recognising that all the effort, sweat, anxiety, joy and sweetness has created something that is simply perfect … and then letting it be, shows maturity and trust. And then the great thing is, we can’t help ourselves, we have to keep creating so each new interaction is another adventure and another discovery about life, about ourselves and about all these fascinatingly creative people we live amongst.

Look out for them, they are there!
Hope that helps – Bev

• This reply was modified 10 years, 7 months ago by Bev.