Hi Nathan,
What you are going through is very common and just like you said, if you think you can do it and you work hard enough, you can achieve what you want. And I think its obvious that you are passionate about changing your life. However, sometimes wanting is not enough. When deciding how you want to change your life, consider your surroundings. Are you around a positive environment? Do you have positive people surrounding you? Do you constantly think positive thoughts? It may not seem like it at first, but even these small things make a huge difference.
You said that you are trying to remember details of your personal life, but that it has been difficult. Sometimes, the reason we forget things is vecause our mind is going into safe mode. Its deleting unnecessary, irrelevant or even displeasing things from your mind to help you cope with whatever you may have gone through. So make sure that when you are ready to go back to your past, you are also ready to take on that small amount of stress or baggage that may come with it. Next, you may want to accept it. Once you accept that this has happened to you, it may be easier to move on. Another way to try and rememver some of the stuff is to surround yoursekf with things that may remind you of anythung. Again, you should only do this is you are ready to accept the things that have happened to you. Peoplem tokens, or other items may help you. It may alsi be effective if you keep somebtype of journal or diary that helps you chronicle your journey. That way, if you have no one to confide in (or you just dont trust that you do), you can have something to get out of your mind.
I think that as long as you dont let your sadness affect yoyr daily life, you will be fine. Sometimes, the thungs that are burdening us actually do a good deed for us.

I truly hope that this has helped you, especially since I practically talked your head off! Feel free to message me, and I will try my absolute best to relate my 16 year-old experienxes to your 21 year- old ones.

Happy peace finding!