Thank you for your response. I do want to mention that within the context of our relationship as stated before we had other issues that needed to be dealt with. I am in counseling now and so is he. We had tried in the past with trying to act as two separate people but because we hadn’t dealt with our past hurts and past issues we could not continue. We did not have the tools to do so. So, I know that we made the best choice for us. I understand what you mean by “that there is no way to prepare and then proceed with a healthy relationship based on the preparation before.” However, I disagree I know that within the context of the relationship we will have to fight, and wrestle and learn and love each other but, without the tools to do so it becomes and unhealthy and hurtful. Though both my ex and I love each other to the moon in back being together right now, love, within itself couldn’t help us. So taking a step back and solely focusing on me and my needs and what i want will allow me to better communicate with him to make this a more healthy relationship. Being frustrated and not understanding why I am frustrated doesn’t help him. All he knows is I’m  frustrated and that’s it. I need to be in better tune with my emotions and why I do things and how I can recognize when the negative thoughts take control and I go 0 to 100. So though we are on a break we still communicate on regular basis and talk about or hopes and our dreams and fears and things that we have learned about each other via our counseling session and etc. Though it may not make sense to all why we are doing this, it makes sense to us why we do it, and to me, that is all that matters.