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January 19, 2018 at 12:09 pm #187629EParticipant
And I do really appreciate everyone saying not to move in with your partner until many years have passed or you become married. I wish I could go back in time and change that and I didn’t so eagerly agree to live with him.
If this relationship doesn’t continue, then I will certainly make this a stead-fast rule that I will follow. And perhaps if it does continue, later on I’d like to have my own place for at least a year just to get the experience of truly being independent from him.
January 19, 2018 at 12:03 pm #187625EParticipantHi, Anita (and also thanks to everyone for their replies. I really appreciate them.)
I’m not really sure how to elaborate more on the fear of disapproval from my parents. It’s always been there. There’s never been a time in my life where I wasn’t trying to seek their praise. I guess it evolved into a somewhat unhealthy obsession, perhaps? I always took the hardest classes I could in primary school (AP, Dual Enrollment, Honors, etc.) and killed myself with 3-4 hours of sleep regularly to ensure I got the highest marks in all my classes. It was this in combination with volunteering as often as I could and playing sports so I’d look “ideal” to universities and get scholarships. I’m trying to develop much healthier habits now. I stick to a routine; I exercise for stress relief.
As far as his therapy, he hasn’t shared anything with me and I don’t ask him to. I assumed if he wants to share, he’ll tell me. I’ve only been back here for five months, which isn’t a crazy amount of time. But it certainly doesn’t feel like five months, either. Maybe two months maximum is what it feels like.
I have speculations about why he exploded, but I’m not willing to be intrusive with what happens between his therapist and him.
Thanks again to everyone for their responses!
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