Good Morning Anita,

“for healing, the answer needs to be instead: this is not continuing, and the blame game is not a thing!        Yes Ma’am! I shall change my verbiage.

“I don’t allow my mother and family to disrespect me, I’m also called ‘the bitch’” -if the information that you are called “the b****” by whomever is reaching you at the present time, then you are still being disrespected by whomever is passing this information to you. This is just a stamp now, a badge of honor, that i wear proudly. They can call me w/e I don’t think much about it. I brought it up as this was the case, and I thought it helped to understand the situation better.

“I just walk away and cut people out, if they haven’t already cut me out” – did you cut abusive people permanently out of your life, including family members, or do you cut somut it. e abusive people out of your life for a while and then reconnect? Yes i am prone to letting people return, but they don’t get the same version of me. The return isn’t a hey we are best friends now, it turns into a cold exchange of hellos and good byes. The return is usually just stupid crap on FB and seeing these people when im with someone who is still friends w the persons.

“I limit my contact w my mother, and she does w me as well. She doesn’t like me, so much so I really thought I wasn’t her kid and took a dna test” – that’s amazing, my goodness! How is the limited contact with her affecting you, and why do you keep any contact with her, if I may ask?  Tough question. I had cut my father out for a while, but i needed a roof over my head and he gave me one. I feel like i always still need my parents. Dad wasn’t around when we were kids, as much as you need. He has PTSD from war, and did some shitty stuff as a human, but was there when i called. Mom is a different beast, she is narcissistic. Mom was home, but never taught us how to be adults or do half the things to survive, well i should say live, as we all are scraping by surviving (none of us lives).  Limiting her exposure to me, and knowing how to work around her seems to work out ok. I get a call once a month or 2. or a text from her. My sister, that i talk to, gets called all the time, My other sister (heard this from the one i talk to ) had a 2 hour call about Jesus (mom’s new thing is the bible with husband #5). I know if i change the subject to myself she quickly wants to hang up.

I guess the short answer is we were taught to be dependent on others, like she showed us growing up.

Thanks Emmy

Anita, So,  I may feel fine for a bit, but not a permanent solution? Is this why I felt withdrawal from the moldavite? As though it were another medication attempt, a little relief , but low and behold it returns?  Or is this my exhaustion entirely?  If this is the case, how is it that a person can “unblock” themselves? This can’t just be an endless cycle of suffering.

I really appreciate the info. That all makes a ton of sense, i’m not sure what else to do to stop it.

Emmy

Anita, All of the information you have listed above , is also the information I have.

-” I wonder if you were, like I was, a very lonely, lost and scared child, hoping and waiting to be found and rescued by someone?”

This is a definite possibility, not going to lie, parents were neglectful, mother basically makes everyone turn on me (I have 4 sisters I speak to one, one intermittently. I’m blamed for everything.)

-Depression is a 20+ battle, ptsd, anxiety, depression. I have literally been on every single depression med available and am not well.  I went to another dr a month ago, she gave me a BP med and something else to try, but that was the last of what she could try. I am still not taking those meds. I have low BP and it reduces BP, the dr never saw me in office, I don’t trust it. I’ll try another dr.

– Bouts of exhaustion, not related. I get tired from depression, I nap daily. However, once in a while, w no rhyme or reason I get this exhaustion, it lasts a day or so, and is gone after that until it returns. It is so infrequent that I can’t pin point its reasoning. And it is so intense that it can sleep a day away if i wanted. Can’t lift my arms tired like i had the flu a month or something

I’m not sure what else I maybe missing let me know if I answered all your?’s.

Emmy

Hi Anita, I put it on a silver chain, wrapped it in some wire to hold it.

Emmy

Hi Peggy,

i just wanted to check in on you, this time. You had said you had a bout of the tired, so making sure all is well. I go through the same, usually a medical issue or my depression. So i hope all is well. Sending light and love. Be well.

Emmy

Hi Peggy,

I actually sleep w a rock lamp in my room, have for about 2 years, and carry selenite, a nice piece of it, i put it under my pillow. I sage often as well. Thank you for all your help, i am very grateful.

Thank you again,

Emmy

Good Morning Peggy,

I hope all is well. Just an update: The blocks aren’t moving, the signs are just as bad if not worse. haven’t had a dream i can remember. And i feel like im losing my mind. Again, trying to post on here and it keeps kicking me off.  It is as though someone doesn’t want me to have the answer.  tough few days.

Best wishes, Emmy