Hi Inky,

Noticed that you’re one of the active contributors to this forum and I really admire you for that.

About that, I most likely wouldn’t do that since it would be obvious that it came from me and I don’t wanna put more barriers/gaps between me and my officemates.

I’m finding it hard to work since I felt like I was thrown away and all, but I keep on reading and keeping in touch with my spiritual self. These tangible things around me (their pictures on Facebook, the small gifts the guy gives her that she shares with everyone except me, her presence, etc.) and the intangible things (the approval of everyone with regard to their relationship, how I heard that I was not a better option than my friend according to her friends, etc.).

I don’t know if these emotions/what I’m feeling right now are a sign of a lack of manliness and it’s starting to piss me off…but I do and honestly want to get better each day.

Thanks again Inky!

Thanks, Christopher.m.

In relation to yoga, I don’t think I’ve found the right teacher except for the previous one I had (who isn’t a yoga expert but knows how to handle and facilitate learning well).

I hit the gym thrice a week and it truly does get my mind off things except for the fact that I’m one of the chubbiest/weakest in the gym. (well, I did lose 10 lbs though)

Probably speed dating is a good idea but I hope we have such a thing in our country. Seems fun. I’ll let you guys know if there are.

Overall, it’s still a challenge but I’m okay. NUMBER 2 WAS FUNNY THOUGH (NO BITTERNESS INTENDED) HAHAHA! I still find my ex-girlfriend the prettiest I have to admit.

I will never date a co-worker again, even if she tries to flirt around with me.

Regards

Hi Will,

That was some thorough and realistic advice you got for me back there and I am truly grateful.

I’d like to keep in mind the best things about the advice you gave me such as:

– don’t go for the intimacy part if you aren’t together yet with a label
– breaking the myth of her not having loved me back

But I do think that we started out right as close friends for months before we realized we had something going on. It just so happened that during a movie, she kissed me on the cheek and I accidentally kissed the side of her lip until such time that we both thoughr of the same thing.

I didn’t intend for it to happen that way and I was telling her that I wanted to have introduced myself to her parents before anything else…bur being the typical Asian family they are (her parents are 65 yrs of age), it was too much of a long shot for me to have shown myself to them.

I wanna learn so much from this since I really enjoy romance with the right person, but she taught me how to be happy with myself more and I guess that’s a good thing. A really good one in fact.

However, I still think she did trek on the wrongest of the wrong when she decided to pull off another move with my close friend and now I have set up fences around me to protect myself from being humiliated.

She’s a wonderful person and she could attract a lot of guys because of her personality, but after I got to know more about her it seemed as if she liked the fact that she was surrounded by guys and I just happened to be one she thought would rise above them at some point in time.

I can’t look back now but being friends with her is definitely a “no” now, and I had a call from my coworker that she’s starting to lose interest in my friend too. I guess life happens everyday.

Wishing you the best, Will. And thank you for acknowledging my depression.

Hi Inky,

It seems that my other reply was gone and now I have to start from scratch.

Anyway, thank you very much for the reply. I really appreciate it. I recently talked to her during our company beach outing 1 on 1 since I couldn’t stand the fact that the closure she gave me was still vague and that it was virtual (via Skype).

I cried so much that time in front of her and I feel like all the balls are on her court. But I told her to pray for me that I wouldn’t plant any seeds of anger towards her and my friend (even if my friend didn’t do anything wrong too).

I cried because I lost so much on my end…especially a big chunk of self-esteem. Currently, the circle where my friend and I belong to has been organizing a reunion and all I could do is ignore since I don’t wanna be put in the hot spot (out of embarrassment and all that). In the office, I have to deal with her being surrounded with the friends we share and her talking to them as if I was non-existent. It’s lonesome.

Regarding my friend and her dating, I don’t wanna meddle in their affair but I know that it will pinch a bit if ever they decide to be together as a couple.

I have accepted the fact that we’re never gonna be a couple, but damn I wish I was someplace else.

– hopelesslycharmed