Thanks Matt and Juniper.

Hi Lightsource

Thanks for your post. I will provide my perspective here and hopefully wont double up with other posts.

1. re: fun in the relationship. You need to stop blaming yourself for the breakup.

It is good to have heaps of fun in any relationships. Sometimes, it is not us, which makes people leave us. It is often about the other person who is not able to commit or appreciate something about the relationship. How would you feel if in a few days you find out that your ex-partner has moved on to yet another partner and this could go on for a long time ?

You need to re-focus and make it all about yourself now 🙂 When we are able to do what we want to do in our lives without conditions or hesitation, everything becomes easier. We don’t feel cheated, betrayed or jealous then as our needs are being met. We feel content in our existence. On the other hand, as long as we keep blaming the external circumstances or people for our grief or destiny or things going wrong in life, we keep looking outside for answers and keep binding us down in the chains of sorrow. Does this make sense ?

If Lightsource likes to have fun, then do that. If lightsource likes to chill out in the house with a glass of red, do so. If Lightsource likes to go out pubbing, then do that. Whatever makes you happy and free, do that. You have to live your life in order to move on from negative experiences that we all go through. You are not a slave and you are not someone’s toy either. You are YOU with feelings, desires and emotions but the only person who can appreciate this about you is no one else but YOU. Do you know what I am talking about ?

2. re: negative thoughts. We all go through ups and down in this life and that is what makes life worthwhile. No day is same. Change is the only constant. When we flow with the nature, life feels great. Stop flowing with nature or our needs, life starts to feel burdensome.

We produce close to 60000 thoughts a day and we recycle about close to 90 % everyday, which means we are producing very few new thoughts and just rethinking the old again and again. Thoughts are influenced by everything around us – the news, friends, food we eat, things we look at, FB drama, work drama etc. When we are surrounded by negativity, our thoughts are predominantly of similar energy and we feel heavy and dark. When we are surrounded by positivity, we feel light and bright. Sleep comes easy when we are feeling positive. Ability to help people comes easy when we are feeling light and bright. So I suggest that to turn your thoughts around from predominantly negative state to a positive one, pls try the following:

– Practicing positive affirmations. I have mentioned this in my earlier post as well. Louise Hay, Susan Jeffers, Cheryl Davidson – all provide a useful resource on this. One easy way of putting you to sleep is to listen to one of their positive affirmation CDs. It has 2 benefits – it will put you to sleep and secondly, whole night your subconscious mind will be processing those positive thoughts and when you wake up, you will feel charged 🙂

– Meditation is a great way of easing your mind and thoughts but it can take a while to work for some. Most people focus on trying to eliminate their thoughts during meditation, which doesn’t work. We are creatures of thoughts and the only time, we cant think is when we are in trance. A true trance state can only be achieved by a few who are practicing the right type of meditation for a long time. This takes regular and devoted practice ie no breaks whether you are having a good day or bad day. The meditation that Matt has mentioned is great and you should give it a shot if you have not done so as yet. Another option is to listen to this heart chakra meditation before you go to sleep.

You don’t have to do anything except for close your eyes and listen to the sounds in a dark room. You can think as much as you want 🙂 it is only 10 mins. I am pretty confident that after a few days, You will see a positive change in your reflection of the world and self.

– practicing gratitude is another way of changing your thought pattern – you can be thankful even for the slightest things like hot water for shower, hot water for a cuppa, warm water for washing dishes in winter, fridge to keep our ice cream nice and chilled etc. There are often 50-60 things that we can be thankful for easily in a given day. The more we let the Universe know that we are grateful for things we have in life, the more it grows in our lives.

3. Few pearls that I have picked up over the years

– we are 100 percent responsible for everything that happens in our lives. If we do not like something, we should have the courage to change it and move on. The more we resist the change, the longer it takes to move forward.

– where attention goes, energy flows
where energy flows, things grow. If you do not want to feel sad, do not check the FB or things associated with your ex. Let him go.

– we are made up of atoms at a very basic level, which is energy. Everything in this Universe is energy and like energy attracts like energy. If you are constantly vibrating at a negative energy, you attract people, things or circumstances of similar energy. To turn this around, laugh a lot. Sing and dance. Offer Gratitude. Do selfless service.

– we get what we want but what we do not realise that our wants can be quite conflicting by the time it merges with the Universal consciousness. For example: I want a husband BUT I hope he doesn’t leave me. I hope he DOESNT say no to having babies. I hope he DOESNT do this or that etc. See what I mean. We have a want but we also have a DOES NOT to go with it. How confusing ! Our wants need to be very clear and simple with no “ifs, buts or should”. I want a husband and we will have a beautiful family together and learn the life lessons that we need to learn in a harmonious way. When you send this wish out into the Universe, how can it not come true ? The trick is the belief that it will come true because that is what YOU want without any “ifs, buts or should”.

Ok, enough of my preaching. I think you get the point 🙂

Loads of blessings and it is ok to have a bad day as long as tomo is a better day. No one has all good days and no one has all sad days. Even I do not have endless positive moments but I know how to turn my negative days into positive ones quickly and I did this by working on self. Nothing happens without constant effort or determination or strong will power. Learning doesn’t stop in life school.

J

Thanks Inky 🙂 🙂 and The Ruminant 🙂 🙂

Hey Roohi

I am so sorry for your suffering. I am not going to tell you what you need to do as you are on your journey and you need to learn some lessons before such incidents can be left behind. However, I will try to offer some clarity, which may assist in your decision making.

What does being a 33 year old LEO woman mean ? Is that how you identify yourself ? Are you superstitious and believe in zodiacs ? Just curious.

Look, I have no desire to hurt you or make things more difficult for you but there seems to be a huge conflict going on in your mind about the status of your recent marriage. From your post, I get a feeling that there is a definite lack of open and honest communication between the two of you and there may be some hidden secrets as well. Dishonesty, hiding things from spouse as you do not want to hurt them with your past or whatever other excuses we may like to come up with – these are simple recipes for a DISASTER waiting to happen. You can see the red flags everywhere, cant you ? Whether these are real red flags or perceived, either way, you are not at peace.

Can you take some time off and visit your family for a short holiday ? And you need to have a heart to heart talk with your hubby when you are in a safe place, OK !! Do not attempt to do this heart to heart without any backup friend or family support. Love and marriage should bring out the best in you and not put you through this esp if you have been married only for less than 6 months and you have a history of leaving a marriage after 1 month previously. There is a lot of self reflection and introspection, which needs to occur from your end once everything has settled. Life will keep throwing same challenge in a different disguise until you learn the valuable lesson. The lesson here as I envision it is – You are special and you do not need someone else to make you feel adequate or complete. Let go of the dependency.

I will offer prayers for you tonight and hope you will find peace that your soul seeks. Please be kind to yourself.

Jasmine

Thanks everyone 🙂

Hey SC,

Are you happy ? Do you have a mental bank of happy memories to cash on ? Are you doing things as you want them to be done or are you doing things to satisfy someone else’s expectations ?

The ONLY one reason for feeling disconnected to your original being is when you are not aligned with your being or soul or higher self. What breaks the alignment, you may ask ? When we are pretending to be someone else and not honouring our own needs or wants. So how do you realign ? Stop being someone else and become authentic YOU. How do you do that ? By practicing self acceptance, self love and self nurture everyday. I am not asking you to accept your negativity or bad habits or negative belief systems. I am asking you to accept that you are a beautiful and complete being who is on her own awesome journey in this world. You are loved and you will be looked after in every situation 🙂

Can I recommend the following meditation to see if it makes any difference to your mental chatter, pls ?

You don’t have to do anything except for close your eyes and listen to the sounds in a dark room. You can think as much as you want 🙂 it is only 10 mins. I am pretty confident that after a few days, You will see a positive change in your reflection of the world and self.

Sending you loads of positive energy,

Jasmine

Thanks Deedge

I am glad you could make sense of what I wrote.

Can I suggest the following to show light to your partner’s ex who has left the body.
– Meditate everyday for a few minutes in a dark quiet room and send her light in the heart chakra and see the light entering that chakra – centre of chest.
– Ask for forgiveness and request her to move on with her journey and that you will look after her kids and ex hubby well.
– Do that everyday for a few mins and I believe this will help immensely and you will know when she is resting in peace.
– While you are doing this, can you pls make sure that you ask for forgiveness from yourself as well and others that you may hurt intentionally or unintentionally in the past ever out of ignorance or arrogance. And let all these people go on their journeys.

And wah lah, things will become hunky dory soonish. I have offered prayers for this Partner’s ex wife soul as well.

Blessings,

J

My apologies Ringoo. hey, you better change your password. I think your account may have been hacked as in your previous posts, you talk as if you are a woman and a homosexual. The post to Anyone will confirm it for you so check it out. Perhaps delete the account and restart so there is no confusion for others in the future too 🙂

Regards

J

Wow Inky.

This is so creative and beautiful. Why is Matt’s face turning blue ? He is the most experienced Buddha amongst us all 🙂

Thanks for putting a smile on my face yet again. Loads of positive energy coming your way,

Jasmine

Hi Anonymous,

Thanks for your post.

Interestingly enough, your post came with the answer that you seek. I will post it here for you. Read it a few times and it will sink in as to what you need to do.

“Everything that I have done, such as going to school, working various jobs, being in relationships, etc. have honestly just felt wrong. I’ve always felt like I’m living my life through the perception of others rather than myself”

I will give you a hint – Just be YOU and do what makes your heart sing. You know what you want. Have some courage to follow through those desires as well instead of just focussing on “what if” 🙂

Good luck and I know you will be just fine 🙂 Loads of positive energy coming your way.

Jasmine

• This reply was modified 9 years, 10 months ago by Joshua Denney. Reason: anonymize