Hello Dafne!

I have seen many people that tried and succeeded having a relationship with a single parent. But it’s very difficult. Specially in the early stages. My try didn’t even get to the stage of having problems with her daughters and they were starting to feel comfortable with the fact that their mother and I were seeing each other but it turned out she was not ready for a relationship at the moment.

I and too want to have a quiet and simple life. Where I can work if I want to, a life I can spend the weekends the way we want and with who we want. I also would like to have kids, so I can leave the values I find important behind. During the two months I spent with this woman, I thought we could have all that, even though they were not my kids, but I would accept them like they were, if it was the case.

I know I would never be her priority and I would always “lose” but, I understood that and I was totally okay too.

Now when I look back, I think it was really better not to continue together and I can focus on finding someone that has the same values and plans for the future as me.

I was married already, but it was another complicated story. Now, I’m trying to understand all the ups and downs, so I don’t get into “trouble” again.

Around the people I know, I’m one of the few that still wants something more traditional. But wanting this has a price. The price of being alone for a good time and keep the faith of finding the one we want the most.

I’m looking for a woman that we can share the same sense of humor, wants to build a family, takes care of herself (health and mentally), wants to learn about each other and is up to the task of having a successful relationship.

I don’t go out frequently and it is really hard for me to meet new people. Recently I decided to give another chance to dating apps, but without any expectations. Specially because I never had much luck with them and I prefer much more a in person conversation than chatting.

Have a lovely day you too and take care!

Jay

Hi Aila!

I had a similar experience recently. I met a woman a few months ago. She was four months separated from her husband and was starting the divorce process. She didn’t want any kind of relationship, but we started going out.

We used to spend hours talking on the phone, messaging all day and everyday. We were really into each other. She was even saying that she was willing to see how good as a father I could be for her two teenager girls.

One weekend, one of her daughters had a kidney crisis and had to go to the hospital. We had a whole Saturday planned together and we could not make it. All this situation made us very upset. We could not see each other and her daughter was ill.

She spent the Sunday after all thinking about what happened and how our “relationship” was going to and decided to break up. Saying we couldn’t see each other anymore, and that she didn’t want to hurt me (ended up doing it anyway). She also mentioned that I could do a lot more for her than she could to for me and that was being unfair.

It was a hard hit for me to take. I have been divorced for one year. My ex-wife suffered from depression and anxiety, tried to commit suicide twice while we were married and left me for another guy she met at one of the clinics she was under treatment.

When I met this woman and we got along so well and so fast, I had a hope that had found someone that shared the same values as I, and we could have had a great future together, if I could have made it work. But also according to her words, she was not ready for a relationship right now and parting ways would be the best thing for both of us.

I don’t know if saying this will help you someway but, you are not alone in this kind of situation. Unfortunately we met a good person at a bad time and that’s too bad.