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September 11, 2017 at 1:18 pm #168342
KateParticipantEliana: how do you discern this “love” that is a relationship and “love” that is just… love but no longer a relationship?
We just spoke after 2 weeks no contact. He wants to meet. I’m nervous. I KNOW I am not ready to get back together. I just cannot get over the hump of where we are: like how do we go from where we are back into a situation where I would be ready to say “Yes, I do. Forever.”. I want to be able to commit to someone like that… But I’m just not sure how to bridge that gap from here to there… (if at all)
Keerthi: thanks for your note as well! I wish you the best of luck in working through this. As long as you still see this person as your “forever” or “possibly that forever” -> what I mean is: the path towards the future isn’t dead, then definitely do continue!
Sam I am so, so, so sorry for your situation. What an unbelievably horrible way to be treated by someone you trust. In many ways: it is crazy to see these are his true colors. I am sending you love to get through this! <3 <3 <3
September 7, 2017 at 5:39 pm #167778KateParticipantAnita, thank you so much for a great explanation!
Gia, appreciate your response and thoughts! Per your questions:
a) Differences: 1) Our differences in how we want to experience life (he is more subdued and how he “enjoys” life is so different than me. I love to travel, explore, etc while he does not and is more rational) 2) his love language is physical touch and this can drain me many times
b) Passion has died: I mean that I don’t desire him the way I did before. I turn myself away from him (almost automatically) rather than leaning in… I feel responsible for letting this happen
c) In spite of deciding go your separate ways, you both maintain respect and love for each other. –> yes
d) He misses me too. The decision was more mine than his… and he has contacted me a few times. But I still wonder if I am making a terrible mistake… he has so many qualities which are important to me. I feel like I am “giving up” in a way.. on love.
XO to you both!
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