Hi Anum, it is sad for both you and your mum but you have the chance to move on, remember ultimately she was working the only way she knew how and was probably wishing for help everyday. Start to think of her as not your mum but someone who wanted to do right but didn’t have the tools to do it, and think of yourself as someone who does have the tools to change and every attempt you make shows that, you are on the right road, dont panic if you stray off the track on occasion.