it’s never an easy thing to go through.  The last person described everything so perfectly. Let yourself go through the pain and welcome it into your life, you have to accept it.

I also had a relationship that lasted three years and last year when she broke up with me I was devastated and couldn’t understand why? I asked my self what did I do? how did this happen?  because we were living together I was suddenly homeless.. Before that, I was staying with some family friends and they basically decided to kick me out so I lived in my car for a few weeks. I started having panic attacks, and health anxiety. The best analogy I have is I built this house and suddenly an earthquake happened it brought everything I built down (I live in San Francisco). It was all unexpected. Because I am a man I hate to admit but I cried a lot, it hurt me, and I suffered a lot. I felt degraded and angry living in my car. Life will kick you hard, but you have to move on.

Anyway, so I came realize I never loved her. I mean, I loved her but was never IN love with her.  I loved the connection we had because it was so easy to be with her and we always had fun. 7 months later I realized this, and am glad she ended it. The only issue was that like you boyfriend she wanted a break and to have space. In retrospect, I wish she would have ended it there what she did was cruel to me and had me thinking for two months if we were going to get back.

What I want to tell you is this, Do you really love him? or do you think you love him? Do you guys have anything in common other than life circumstances that brought you two together? And ask yourself deep down how you feel. At one point I began to think that I could possibly marry my ex but deep down I knew that I would be unhappy. From my experience, I think it’s cruel to be in a break and  I will recommend you just end the relationship there. Break off clean, find ways to distract yourself, like the other person mentioned, write, write, write it helps a lot. And please try not to overthink take it day by day. If he decides to come back then he will come back. My first few months like I said were rough, but today I am so happy that relationship ended. I am also grateful for that challenging time because I learned so much more about my self in 3 months than the 26 years I have been alive.

One other thing while you go through this go meditate, run and do Yoga it helped me a lot

I hope I made sense and that from my experience it helped. I felt like I rambled on

Best to you,

D