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Jane

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  • in reply to: Feeling a bit confused #51487
    Jane
    Participant

    Hi Matt, I have been reading your responses to other participants and feel honoured that you’ve taken the time to help me. I love the way you explain things. I did feel a sense of light while I was with him and others have commented on this. It makes sense that this joy was more about how it made me feel rather than the person involved. I really don’t want this light to disappear so finding a way to grow that independent of others is really important for me right now. I’ve never been good at self caring and find it hard to just focus on my needs. Icing on a cake sounds brilliant – I think I’ve been thirsty for a long time. I haven’t tried meditation so will check out your recommendation. Thanks again – your warmth is truly felt. Jo 🙂

    in reply to: Feeling a bit confused #51486
    Jane
    Participant

    That’s a very interesting article Mark, I’m going to read more about the teachings of attachment. Unity sounds far more peaceful than this awful need to attach myself to people or ideas. I hope that he will understand my need to take care of myself. Maybe it’s a bit like putting your own mask on in a plane before helping others? I’d like to love myself, it’s a journey that I’m just starting. Thanks for your guidance and support – it is really appreciated. Jo 🙂

    in reply to: Feeling a bit confused #51484
    Jane
    Participant

    Thanks so much for your reply Ben, it’s good to know I’m not alone. I’ve really been thinking about your explanation of our boundaries and I know you’re right, maintaining this relationship is draining away my confidence. No matter how much I tell myself that these feelings will pass with time, deep down I know that sealing the wound is necessary for my well being. Love the quote – I’ll try to remember it. Jo 🙂

    in reply to: Stuck. #51411
    Jane
    Participant

    Hey Lashay, I find myself in a similar situation to you, although the circumstances of our breakup are a little different. I just wanted to say that you are not alone and that there are lots of people out there struggling with the same emotions. I find loving myself is the hardest thing to do after a life of external validation. Matt’s advice is fantastic (thank you Matt), it’s all about loving ourselves before we can love other people. There’s a saying that goes something like “don’t make your happiness dependent on something you can lose”. I keep reminding myself of this – I can’t lose myself so I have to start there. My advice would be shut him down on Twitter for a while, watching him means you aren’t focussing on you. It’s hard to cut of all contact but it will help you recover and move on. Best wishes. Jo

Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)