I myself was blindsided by a divorce after 20 years, my wasbund had an affair and left me and our five boys.  He married the woman and has become a truly despicable person since then.  I had to take him back to court twice in a year and a half to get him to pay his child support and it took the judge threatening to put him in an orange jumpsuit to make him pay.  And he is still behind and seems to think that he only has to pay when he is able, that it is optional somehow.  So it is very hard for me to understand  what you have going on.  It seems to me that he has made his position clear on what he wants from you and what he is or is not willing to do, he doesn’t want to work that hard.  I don’t know you and I don’t know him but I believe that we all have the right to be treated with respect and love.  And if you are going to have someone significant in your life they should want to be there, not just for sex but for everything.  I wish you well on your journey and I hope you find peace.