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Mishappy

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  • in reply to: I feel like I'm not good enough for my boyfriend? #90681
    Mishappy
    Participant

    Thank you, Anita, for replying. I saw that the posts were from long ago. I wrote because the topic continues to be relevant. Sometimes, one searches the net just hoping for answers. I’m now in a good place but I remember when I was hurting so bad I felt it wasn’t worth living. The journey was hard but worth it. Your blogs are of great help to people in such a situation. I just wish I would have found you earlier. Melissa

    in reply to: I feel like I'm not good enough for my boyfriend? #90651
    Mishappy
    Participant

    Allow me to share a short story. My boyfriend used to make me feel that I was not good enough for him. I was out of his league. He was popular, charming, a trust fund kid, rode motorcycles, great fun to be with and significantly younger than me. I shared many of his passions and felt very alive with him, he was very special to me and I really wanted him as my significant other. But he used me and used my things to attract other females, he humiliated and belittled me. And even though I risked my life for him when he was in trouble I was still not good enough to get into his car as far as he was concerned, or to introduce to his friends etc… I waited. You could say that I was angry, very angry. But I stuck it out. Ten years later, with help, have to let you use your imagination… hmmm… he lost his job (too many females were throwing themselves, too many guys misogynist at his job), he gained 100 pounds, did I mention he did not consider me attractive enough? My car is now a brand new high-end that he begs to get into, we ‘slum’ in his car, his friends are respectful towards me. He is caring, considerate, shares everything he has with me in fact lets me have the better, works hard on making me happy and healthy. He has a job where most people are married. What brought about the change? I changed. I went from blindly loving him and giving anything and everything to ‘leveling the playing field’. Now we are in a happy reciprocal relationship, for the last 6 years, we both value each other. But there is no question which one of us is the leader.
    I believe that you determine your own value. It s not up to someone else to decide what you are worth.

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