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Mary

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  • in reply to: Lost all ambition… #217947
    Mary
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    Hi Umi:

    My situation was a tad bit different in that I lost my career due to an long-term illness and I struggled for a LONG time with this loss.  I had gone back to college late in life (in my mid-40s!) so that I could find myself the professional career I deserved.  I worked hard and made it happen.  But just 2 1/2 years into this so-called perfect job, I got very sick.  When I left that job, I kept thinking that everyone would see me as a complete failure since I could no longer support myself and be the independent person I once was.  Moreover, I worried that people would judge me for not having the assets and living the lifestyle that is typically required in society (I live in the US and materialism is especially over the top these days!).

    The interesting thing is, once I started to get my health back on track, I realized that my original career path was causing me a lot of stress.  Consequently I decided that I would only work part-time helping my husband with his small business.  Thankfully my husband has been very supportive, so I am lucky in that I don’t have to worry about paying the bills like I did when I was single.  Ultimately I was able to explore a lot of really cool volunteer opportunities.  By volunteering in areas that really interest me (animal rescue, the environment, etc.), I finally realized that I never really belonged in the career I had been in!!  All that work to get the professional job I had and yet an illness was what it took to discover that I would much rather pursue things near to my heart (not Human Resources, which was the field I had been in).  If I had to do it all over again, I would have pursued a career I was passionate about, not just something that would pay the bills or look good on paper.

    I think Jayde has some really good ideas for you.  Downsizing your lifestyle so that you have less bills coming in really makes a difference.  Then you can try to focus on a job that will allow you to continue feeling the contentment you have in your life now, even if it doesn’t pay as much.  My husband and I are making a big change right now so that he can retire soon.  We are downsizing our living space to a 1065 square foot home and tightening the belt in many ways.  In the process, we discovered that we really don’t need all that much to be happy.  Like Jayde said, take it slowly and don’t make too many big changes right away.  But come up with a plan to make it happen if you really want it to happen.  Life is so short and if you look around, you will see so many people who stay on a track that they really don’t enjoy.  Only the really brave people step outside of the box and follow their own path.  The fact that you realize that you are actually happier by NOT pursuing that high-powered job, that is the first step!  You are young and the sky really is the limit. 🙂

    Best of luck!

     

     

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