Hi Anita,

Thank you very much for reply. I really appreciate your input. I understand your reasoning and you are probably right, if it were a good friend of mine I would likely say the same – to take the job, but it’s harder said than done when it involves being away from someone you love. Although he may be discontented with Virginia, at this point he has no choice as he is in the military, so will have to make it work. But I agree, making sacrifices that are damaging to me or to my career would not be dong any favors to our relationship.

Hi Anita,

Thank you for your input. Unfortunately I can’t extend the lease, and would prefer not to move to a different spot in the city, to only move again in a month or two. But that is a good point and idea, to have some more time to ease into the transition. And you’re totally right, having a good job isn’t everything, in fact I feel like I place deep value in all of my relationships, but at the same time I want to be successful and feel proud of what I do, and not have to sacrifice that. This is a real test for our relationship, and though I certainly want to get closer to my partner, it’s very difficult to see how this Coast Guard situation benefits me in any way.

Inky,

Thank you so much for your thoughts. I know this is common, doesn’t make it any easier though. You are right also that breaking into advertising is very difficult and competitive, which is why I feel that both myself and my partner at pivotal moments in our careers, where we’re just going to do it or not. You also have a good point that all I really need is a computer, I’m not necessarily opposed to freelancing but I need more agency experience before I can say I’m really experienced in my field. I’ll definitely check out the support network.

I really appreciate your thoughts! Thank you both for being awesome people!

Hugs,

Dear Anita and Squig,

Thank you both for responding! And Anita, to my last post as well. I appreciate you listening and your input.

Anita, there certainly is uncertainty (pun intended), and I think it’s a combination of doubting past decisions, and uncertainty about the future. I am unsure of where I will be living in the next year, a move is coming, I am unsure of past relationship decisions I have made and moves I have made. I know it’s all a process, but it feels like there’s a few decisions I’ve made that I’m not quite sure were the right ones, but then I guess we can only look to present and future and take it from there. These probably are having an effect on my personality changes.

And Squig, thanks so much for sharing. I can relate to a lot of what you said about your past in moving and relationships etc, and also the inner critic. I think in this case concerning being more reserved I am more observing and wondering where it’s coming from, but my inner critic is very active, I criticize myself often, and often do not feel “good enough”. I also have not been taking proper care of myself physically, and that is something I need to work on. Maybe if I can do a better job at that I’ll start to come out of my shell again.

Thank you both so much! Hugs.

• This reply was modified 7 years, 4 months ago by Jen.

Thank you all so much for your input! You all are so insightful. I will definitely consider all of these points.