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Arlene

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Viewing 4 posts - 16 through 19 (of 19 total)
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  • in reply to: reconciliation of a long distance relationship #112339
    Arlene
    Participant

    Hi Anita! Thanks for your thoughts. His daughter and I get along well. I think it was just me who was feeling that at the time to find an explanation why he’s distant. He told me once that he has never “given his heart to anyone ” and that I may be that first person he’ll love, so I was devastated when he let me go that easy. My number one problem is I miss the twice a day FaceTime—when waking up in the morning till I go to work and when he goes wakes up and it’s my time to work. I’m so confused because there was no argument that happened, no goodbyes. And now I miss him so much and won’t return my texts nor calls. Can’t we be at least civil about it. And start again as friends? His family likes me.

    in reply to: reconciliation of a long distance relationship #112317
    Arlene
    Participant

    not clutter but culture (typo error)

    in reply to: reconciliation of a long distance relationship #112316
    Arlene
    Participant

    hi, anita! thanks for the reply…on FaceTime he is very sweet and says I love you, i care for you a lot, but in person, he’s just like a friend. i somehow expected that since we live half of the world apart that when we see each other, he will be attentive and sweet to me. i already told him this, but he replies that i am just insecure and needy. my take is that, if he will just let me feel loved then i wouldn’t be insecure. we had a disagreement about this. i told him that Philippine culture still believes in “courtship”, that the guy pursues and woos the girl. so he assured me that he will try to improve and be more sensitive to my needs. but he has not improved. until last june, when i was with him in maine, his 8 year old daughter was also with us, his attention was divided and i really felt ignored. i was so frustrated that i told him we need to have a break and i wanted to go home then despite my flight schedule being in july. no arguments, no conversations, he just said okay. so i just kept crying because he just let me go like that. he drove me to and dropped me of at the airport, 4-hr drive without any conversation. when i got back to manila and started processing things, i realised that maybe i was just to bratty, impatient and tactless. that i hurt his feelings and ego. since then, i tried my best to communicate but he didn’t answer. no more FaceTime despite of a year of daily average of 6 hours of FaceTime. he said he hasn’t taken back anyone “who has kicked him to the curb” and that he once respected my clutter about working things out but he does not believe in that anymore. he told me to go on dates and move on. please help me get him back, he was a very good man.

    in reply to: Broke up with boyfriend because I'm unhappy #112295
    Arlene
    Participant

    Hi! I need your advice. I was in a long distance relationship, broke up with him 2 months ago because i was unhappy. He is emotionally distant and cold. I tried to understand because of his background— he’s 65 years old, 2x divorced, retired army (been in the military since 18 years old). I am 45, single and no kids…I always tell him about his lack of affection which is totally different when we are on FaceTime. Because he is in Maine and I’m in Manila, our non-working hours are spent on FaceTime. I try to visit him every other month and stay with him for several weeks but he still is distant. So I broke our relationship and was being a brat when I said I want to go back to Manila right there and then. Anyway, he never spoke to me on the trip to the airport and just dropped me off. I was so devastated! so for the last 2 months, I kept texting him to take me back, that I was sorry for being impatient with his promise to change and be sweeter. But he replied that he doesn’t want to take me back and he doesn’t believe in second chances. How can I get him back?

Viewing 4 posts - 16 through 19 (of 19 total)