I’ve been having similar problem. It’s been a year, I’m in college and I really do not have the motivation to finish my study. I’ve been wasting my time and my parents’ money. They already know about this last summer holiday when I came home, but it’s been some time since I close myself from them and they didn’t (or maybe couldn’t) give me some real advice on how to solve this problem.

I have no motivation to do anything. I sleep too much and sit in front of the computer for hours doing random stuff. I cannot excite myself in doing things I used to love like reading books and crocheting. I shut people out, have very few friends and rarely see them. I do have a boyfriend and he’s been really supportive, but it’s not helping at all. And when we go out, I have fun, I enjoy our time together, but when I get back to my place, nothing. It feels like I’m bottling it all inside when I’m with people or when I’m alone, and at times it just comes out uncontrollably.

Some time ago I had realisation about nihilistic point of view, how it’s actually kind of true, but in my life I’ve never really cared about beliefs or principal or anything so I guess that can’t be the problem. It can be about the subject that I’m studying, because I actually didn’t even know this major exists before I got in (this is a complicated situation and a long story to type). I don’t know what is the cause and I’d like to know since I hate exploding and crying uncontrollably at times when it all becomes too much.

I’m sorry, Michael, that I’m not giving any answer to your question. But when I read your post, to be honest I feel a little relieved to know other people go through similar situation. I’m glad that you manage to finish your study and don’t have to go through what happened to me (it hurts so bad when your own father calls you “not normal” for being like this), and I wish you all the best in life.