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Notebookb6

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 40 total)
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  • #374662
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    Thank you for the insights and analysis based on our previous conversations, I gave a thought about it and has sent message to make appointment for online therapy session, and we’ll see how it progress from there. Thank you so much

    #374301
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    Thank you for spending time replying with such long reply, I read it this morning and thinking that my relationship with parents could be the main reason of me constantly seeking love from external source, hence resulting in easily having crushes on people who treated me nicely. I constantly seeking for people to fill in my emotional needs, without knowing how to make myself happy at first.

    Do you have any advice in overcoming this issue? By far I have tried solutions such as reading self help books, listening to Buddhist talks and making myself busy/ to be more socialize. Or is there a need to consult a therapist?

    #374263
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear Anita,

    Understand that the frequency lessening happens naturally, my anxious mind couldn’t accept it as a fact, results in I often dry talk to him even when there is nothing to say, showing my neediness and it leads to him becoming less interested over time. We used to text 12 hours a day, and now the conversation lasted for only 1-2 hour.

    While he focusing on his art career, I have my art career to focus on too, but because my mind is always occupied with things related to him, my art progress has been in stagnant state for awhile.. Im trying my best in taking back control of things I focus on and shift focus away from him

    #372038
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear Anita, happy new year to you too!

    To reply with your questions:
    <p style=”text-align: left;”>1. We were discussing about whether if two person able to share the same dream, and he asked me if I have had someone appear in my dream before.</p>
    2. No there is nothing sexual between us at all. The lucid dream he shared was about his adventure , things like exploring a haunted house or encountering forest spirit.<span style=”text-align: right;”> </span>

    #297999
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    Yes, we are better to remain as a best friend. I hope he is able to cope with the rejection and move on soon.

    I’m grateful to be able to live away from home, it was one of the best decision made.

    Regarding bisexuality, I find myself more attracted to butch female than to men, romantically and sexually. This might change over time but for this moment, I can imagine myself having a female partner in the future.

    #297969
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear Anita,

    It’s been a while since we talk, I miss you despite not knowing you in real life and would like to share my story with you.

    The first 3 months I moved to this new city, I’ve trying hard to get back with ex-boyfriend, eventually, he rejected me. I slowly moved on and later on develop a crush on a same-sex coworker. Having gay panic for the first time in my life, I spent the following 4 months trying to accept the fact that I’m a bisexual. It felt better after I came out to some close friends and if possible, I’m going to a pride parade in this city during this pride month.

    Meanwhile, a significant amount of time has spent on self-discovery and improvement. I’ve signed up a gym, created more arts and made friends throughout the months. I slowly gained a sense of self, and practice self-love the best I can.

    I still remained friends with my ex, we contact each other and meet-up occasionally, he slowly noticed my changes and starts to like me back. Up to this point, I have no longer love him romantically, though I still value our friendship. Tonight, he confessed to me he wanted to get back together, I rejected him gently and encouraged him to focus more on self-development. It felt strange when I’ve turned the table on him. Guess this is what love is: unpredictable and it usually doesn’t last forever. I feel bad for him, I can relate to his pain, it was what I experienced last year but my feeling towards him had changed after discovered my sexual orientation.

    #235905
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear anita

    After moving into new city I don’t feel ‘stuck’ anymore. Recently I’ve started meditate before sleep, it helps to calm my mind and to accept myself more.

    #235813
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear anita

    A month ago (a week after breakup) I asked him if he wants to get back together and he said no. He wanted to stay single for a while, while I have the same thought too, to stay single for self development purpose. But we remained contact as friend, and since the breakup I’ve noticed I’m improving myself mentally(I was depressed and had anxiety a lot back then, and now I’m comfortable with my new life in new city). The changes of my mind affects the dynamic of our relationship now. I’m more accepting and generally we get along well.

    #235733
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear anita

    updates:

    I had a good rest that night thankfully. There was no heart pounding fast and heavy chest since I started working at the new job yay!

    Yesterday was a public holiday, I invited my ex for an outing and to come over my accommodation for viewing, I cooked him dinner before he left. We had good times and talk about our recent lives, he talked about his family too.

    You might be against about my act of hanging out with him and inviting him over, but I felt there is still a connection between us and me don’t wanna to let it go yet…

     

     

    #234969
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    Alright will take note to that, will try it if it happens tonight (hopefully not!)

    Will keep you updated soon 🙂

    #234965
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear anita

    Yes distress is exhausting. I had this feeling sometimes but I’m glad I’m able to trust some of my friend who will never do this to me.

    I’ve forgot to mention last night when I was getting to sleep early, my chest felt heavy and heart was pounding fast every time I’m about to sleep. It wakes me up few times I just couldn’t sleep like usual. It might be my anxiety on my first day working , hope today I’m able to sleep as usual.

    #234943
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear anita,

    Yes, I miss closeness with other, I even CRAVE for it 🙁 But sometimes when I’m with someone for too long it felt exhausted and I wanted to be alone. So contradicting isn’t it?

    But it will be ok as I’m heading back home this weekends (I’m just beside home country so can go back more often)

    As you said, hope I’m able to endure the loneliness for now, and eventually new relationship with people will be formed.

    #234931
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear anita,

    It feels good when knowing someone out there who is willing to listen to me, especially when I’m alone in a different country. So thank you for being a good listener anita. Living here makes me feel more lonely, I think I’m starting to get homesick. I miss my ex more during this time too, we used to catch up on each other every night but now when I wanted to share anything he is not there for me anymore. I miss him so..so.. much.

    I started my new job today, it was good. Bosses and colleagues are friendly, I hope I’m able to catch up on the job scope very soon. Hope everything will be fine the day onwards.

     

    #234673
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Updates

    Dear anita,

    I’ve just moved to a new country and I’m starting a new job tomorrow. It seems like life is getting more exciting after leaving from home and starting a new life over here. I’m grateful to be able to find a room with cheaper rental and good environment.

    It’s been 1 and half month since the break-up. I still miss my ex but I’m getting better in controlling my emotion. Recently I picked up a book “The Power of Now” and it really helps me in gaining insight into being in joy.

    #229995
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear anita

    Alright will update you as soon I have any progress.

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 40 total)