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KamalParticipant
Dear Jemma,
At the onset, the acknowledgement in itself is a huge step. Having said that this is nature taking its course, don’t beat yourself over it. As the inherent Buddha in all of us reflects, divert your energy on what can this teach me, what can I learn from it rather than on why am I like this? We all have something about us that we would want to change, in your case the idea that you are unable to fully trust people, even the ones you love.
Take a deep breath, calm down and see within. The people are never wrong. NEVER. Even when they have caused you real pain & suffering, it is all coming from a place of deep pain & suffering that they have been through. This is not easy to relate to, so tell yourself to breathe, close your eyes and contemplate. Next, meditate on the thought , ‘I trust all beings of mother nature & if they so happen to betray my trust I forgive them, choosing to see & acknowledge the Buddha within all of them, the essential good within them.’ Say this to yourself every-time doubts creep in and always be aware of what the Buddha taught, i.e. Suffering & pain are inevitable, what we need to develop is to be observe them with our Buddha minds, without reacting and finally extend the trust you have in yourself outwards to all beings, and like you yourself would have or will break that trust/promise to yourself because that is being human, others could to, this does not make them, infact it makes them human, it puts them in the same boat as all of us.
Remember this, you are happy, you are peaceful, you are liberated. You are the Buddha.
Cheers!
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