Matt,

thank you so much for your advice. I really enjoyed the image of someone doing the laundry when he or she is in fact hungry and wondering why it doesn’t work. And to get to my original problem: he or she doesn’t even do anything ‘wrong’, in fact his or her skills would be much wider than “just” eating (not that there’s anything wrong with eating), they are just applied inappropriately. Thank you, that helped me. And made me laugh.
So yes, I guess it is about taking it all more like a journey and a game and FUN… In general I am all in for that. Just sometimes I doubt 🙂
I will look into the Metta meditation!

Thanks and good night,
Vera

Hey you,

thank you so much for your nice and warm answers. I enjoyed reading them – but I have to admit it didn’t click yet. But I don’t know how to make my point more clear – or maybe understand your points more clearly.
If I take the hunger example: I like that easy comparison. Only, if I am feeling bad it is not that I do something and I feel good. It is not like eating something and then everything is gone. It is as if I am eating and I am still hungry and I am blaming myself for not being not hungry.

I can give an example. I am very indecisive. Some days worse than others. And then I just don’t feel right because I am causing others complications or make them wait (basically that) and also because I am making it so much harder for myself. It is not a good feeling to not know what you want – and I mean from what I want to wear to what I want to eat to if I want to go to watch a movie or dance or stay home or or or. I don’t mean big decisions, I mean the small ones that we take everyday and that can slow you down very much if you have to think about each one very long…. And then I think that somehow every other person seems to be able to chose what they want so there is clearly some twist in my head. Or the twist is not to be ok with being indecisive. It doesn’t matter because in the end it means that I could change me to be happier by changing my attitude. And yet I can’t. So I fail and am responsible for having a bad day.

I don’t know if this is something different or more clear than what I wrote before. I am really thankful for your answers, perhaps I’ll just let them sink in a bit : )

All best,
Vera