Forum Replies Created
April 21, 2013 at 6:32 pm in reply to: When your head and heart take absence after heartbreak #34139TenguiParticipant
I created a profile just to answer to you. I have been in a similar situation as you and I am still dealing with the repercussions of that failed relationship. I chose to let it go because I wanted more for myself…..somewhere during that relationship – I lost who I was, I emotionally shut down, and I no longer saw myself without him. However, as I said, I chose to let it and him go. The months proceeding that split has been filled with many phases….. my emotions we shut off, my mind did not trust itself, I did not trust my decisions/judgement, I was filled with regret because of the situation I had gotten myself in and I began to self-loathe.
For the first year and a half, I experienced this numbness and disconnect, with nights of crying, then 6 months later I would have a few positive emotions and then fall into a deeper hole of negativity…depression? Maybe…but still on the outside I functioned – went to work, socialized, shmoozed but inside I was in turmoil… Then a few months later, I had more positive moments with the negative bouts. I guess it was my body reacquainting itself with more emotions, but at its own time. When I forced certain feelings I just got more depressed.
Now, I am still dealing with finding myself – but it is a better life without him. I think that if you have been prompted to come on here and type this, then there is a huge divide, I cannot make this decision for you, but ultimately you need choose. Do you deserve better? Do you want better? Can you envision yourself in this relationship in the state you are in for the rest of your life? We are sentient beings and should not be numb, and the fact that your body has placed you in that mode speaks volumes.
It is a hard decision, but know that you will be able to survive whatever decision you choose.