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Kendall Adams

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  • #128111
    Kendall Adams
    Participant

    Anita (and Holly!)

    Thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement, and especially for your advice.

    I sent the letter out similar to your brilliant wording Anita, and I added some loving touches and more or less expressed that I die to us and that I am letting him go. I felt a sort of release when I put it in the mail. I doubt he’ll respond, but at least it will give him something to think about/consider until we talk again in 55 days (yes I am counting down!) I just hope he doesn’t find this as breaking the ‘no contact’ or disrespected in some way. I was kind in my wording though so I don’t think he’ll be upset.

    Every day seems to be an uphill battle, but yes I need to give this up to God. Jeff would really have to demonstrate himself for me to go back to him, but I earnestly hope that in the coming weeks he grows in maturity and decisiveness, and I grow in strength. Honestly I’ve never felt something like this before in my heart. It’s awful because it’s so hard. Any suggestions for things I can do each day to make this easier or make time go by? I am trying to keep busy – honestly it’s first thing in the morning, late at night, and then at work when I think about it and my heart hurts the most. It’s better when I’m with friends or staying busy.

    #128015
    Kendall Adams
    Participant

    Anita, do you think that it’s possible, in this communication sabbatical, he will come around and decide he wants to be committed to me again?

    You are right though – I have to prepare for the worst and face the loss. How do I truly let go of him, let go of the old, to make space for the new?

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