I happened to chance upon your post when I was looking for some answers of my own and no guesses what those were. When I read your post I felt I had written every word of it. I have been married almost twelve years now and I am facing this everyday.
To the point that my husband loves his nephews and niece more than our son.
And recently when I put my foot down and refused to continue getting pushed about and let his family continue being disrespectful to me the man I loved and respected (in spite of that facet that he never respected me back) he suddenly changed to someone I do not recognize.
He even told me that I should leave him and walk out of his life if his family makes me so unhappy.
I just don’t know what to do. I love him and cannot envision my life without him but looks like me and my son do not matter to him at all.