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feeling more self-fulfilled and at peace with myself. Feel free to comment on anything that I’ve said so far
I also am reading the AP Psychology book, my ap world history teacher lent me. Psychology is awesome! Psychology is the biopsychosocial process of how a person thinks and behaves which can be influenced by environmental, genetic and social factors. The number of mu receptors determines a person’s tolerance to pain, yet people can minimize pain if they focus on something else such as when a doctor tells a patient to look away when they are given a shot, by focusing on something else, the pain receptors in the brain aren’t as active since the mind is focused somewhere else and the person only feels a slight sensation. Also there is the power of suggestion such as when people have complete faith in what their doctors say and do something that they never would have done unless under hypnosis such as in a case study where some patients who were sick were given a pill that was really a gummy bear disguised to look like a pill, yet they were told that this pill would make them better, the patients took the pretend pill and were better. It is amazing what the mind can do and how it can affect health. Since the brain has nerves connecting to our body and these nerves communicate messages that help send electrical signals to help our body function, our mental thoughts can affect our bodies negatively or positively depending on what we think about. There is also the theory of multiple intelligence where Howard Gardner thought mind could be divided into eight different specific functions each person having a different degree of the eight different intelligences. The eight different intelligences are:
1. Musical Rhythmic and Harmonical- talent in music, sounds, singing (I like music and can imitate them, but I’m not an instrument person)
2. Visual-Spatial: imaginative, visualize things clearly in their minds (applies to me)
3. Verbal-linguistic: good at reading, writing, memorizing words and dates (applies to me)
4. Logical- mathematical: reasoning, numbers, critical thinking, problem-solving (algebra is okay, but I have a more creative mindset and enjoy science to math)
5. Bodily-kinesthetic: agility, coordination, athleticism, people who have high bodily-kinesthetic are good at sports (amateur soccer and lacrosse, bowling and badminton are great) , dancing (not in front of people), acting (I don’t like the stage, but i can perform)
6. Interpersonal: empathy, compassion, understanding for other’s moods, cooperation, teamwork, leader or follower, enjoy discussion and debate (applies to me)
7. Intrapersonal: relating to the self, self-reflective, able to see one’s faults and talents, understand oneself (applies to me, although sometimes I have trouble finding out who I really am and wondering what my talents are)
8. Naturalistic: survival in nature, interest and connection in nature, retaining information from nature and surroundings, human interaction with environment such as hunter-gatherers (applies to me, I love nature and enjoy camping. I have stuff to learn about wilderness survival though, but I think I know enough)
Also in psychology, it also says that there are three types of parents: demanding, authoritative and passive. Demanding parents are good because they teach their kids self-discipline and morals, yet they can be be judgmental, criticizing and hard to open up to and are also the ones who enforce rules such as grounding or placed on restriction. Authoritative parents are the best way to be because they discipline their children, yet also allow them to grow and develop independently, they are open-minded, praise their children for good things, but also reprimand them in a way that creates a healthy relationship between the child and the parent and isn’t too demanding and negative on the child. Authoritative parents maintain a healthy authority, but also let kids have a freedom. Passive parents let their kids have mostly free reign on their own lives and don’t punish as much. Also there have been some studies that children with demanding parents are more likely to develop eating disorders like anorexia because they feel like they need something they can control and the stress from their parents often leads to feel like they need some sense of worth. Also there is also a theory that men who get along with their mothers will treat their wives well since they have a feminine influence. It’s amazing how much insight psychology can bring in understanding people. Sometimes children will try to please their friends by doing reckless things since they can’t please their parents no matter how hard they try. Such as in the realistic fiction story, The Girl is Murder by Kathryn Miller Haines where Tom Barney’s parents didn’t think there was a future for their son because, Tom’s older brother Michael had been arrested and Tom could turn out like them. At first Tom was a very studious student, yet when he couldn’t please his parents because their opinions of him were already jaded by his brother, he began to think of the uselessness of trying so hard and began to take a downhill turn. He makes a bad turn when he tries to please a self-absorbed girl, Grace by joining the military because he thought it would please her to know he was a brave person. Is it really worth it to let other people’s negative opinions influence your path?
I think I have learned a lot and acquired much insight into people’s behavior and the way they act just from reading Meyers AP Psychology. Do you think children can change themselves for the better if they don’t like some of the values their parents have? I believe that they can, yet there are so many people who say that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree and no matter how hard you try, you will still be like your parents. I know that I value hard work and education same as my parents, I also value self-discipline like them. Yet different from them, I am more of a realist and also more spiritual and hopeful than they are. I believe that there are many possibilities out there and that if you believe and work hard you can go far and attain happiness in life. I believe that there should be temperance in self-discipline and that an open mind and compassion are great instead of being judgmental and not accepting some things. I am the person who if I have a goal, I will try my best to work for it and although sometimes I do compare myself to others, i try not to let it bring me down, but to let others’ successes to motivate me in creating my own. Although sometimes I may have doubts, I try not to let what others say bring me down and if something bad happens, I try to accept it and say whatever, stuff like this happens, i’ll just let it go. I don’t want to be like my parents in the way they hold on to negative thoughts and let negative occurrences bring them down, I want to find spiritual fulfillment in life by understanding myself instead of seeking it through material pressures like money and to live each moment of my life being grateful just to be alive. The people I admire the most aren’t the wealthy and smart ones, there the ones who are healthy and fit like Jillian Michaels and also the ones who are spiritually fulfilled like Buddha. Currently I am working on how to build my immune system, improve my circulation (keeping my hands and feet from getting too cold in winter and too hot in the summer) and healing my eyesight. Feel
Thanks a lot! I think in the summer, I will be going away to basic training for national guard which will provide tuition for college. I hope I pass the military entrance processing and the ASVAB which I’m hoping to get at least a 56 on. You need a 32 to enlist, but for certain jobs you need a high grade. The highest grade is a 99 which means you scored better than 99% of other test takers, yet few people get 59 or higher. I hope to go into computers, radio communications, medical or military police. The SATs may be rescheduled to Feb. 20th, so I’m not sure if I’m still taking the test that is out of 2400 points or out of 1600, but I think it will be the 2400 points because the new test won’t go into effect until March 5th which is another test date. The new SAT doesn’t give much points for the essay since colleges don’t look at it much, but if you complete the essay (you get 50 minutes instead of the usual 25 minutes for the old SATs), you get your score separately. The new SAt has more math points added especially for probability and statistics, logical reasoning and algebra and geometry. I am nervous about the new SAts because I took the PSATs which were a reflection of what may be on the 1600 SAT and I got a 1060 on it. For the PSATs in sophomore year, I got a 1290 and they were reflective of the old SATs. I am nervous about the logical reasoning and probability and statistics questions. It snowed 2 ft in Brick, NJ today and the snow was moderately heavy to shovel, but I enjoyed it. The weather channel is debating to call the storm “Monster Storm or “Storm Jonas.” Nature is always so beautiful, I always like rain and snow, it’s always nice to hear the rain on the window pane and also to look out into a snow storm and see a winter wonderland. Also, I’ve always liked the snow more than the wind. Every time it snows, I feel like I have more energy because the cold is easy for me to workout in and the beauty of nature is breathtaking. Also when there is a thunderstorm, I often find myself feeling connected to the static energy of the lightning and experiencing mental clarity and psychic awareness. I also count the seconds of lightning and thunder and calculate how far away the storm is. I love to see patterns in nature and often am excited when I hear news of a meteor shower, lunar eclipse or other astronomical event. I am currently reading Girl, interrupted by Susanna Kaysen to prepare for senior year psychology class. I feel bad for those patients at Mclean mental hospital in the 1960s because they experienced harsh treatment like seclusion, shock therapy and also ice bag therapy. The book is a memoir of Susanna Kaysen’s. I felt sad when Jim Watson offers Susanna to run away to England with him and start a new life, but she is hesitant because she doesn’t know what the real world is like. Everyone at Mclean hospital has some mental disorder of varying degrees. One character Lisa seems almost normal as she is always trying to escape the hospital for a sense of freedom, yet she is always admitted back because she has no money and not sure how she can survive. Lisa barely eats and sleeps and is calmer at night and I feel sorry for her. The only form of entertainment for the patients at Mclean hospital is the tv which only features bland things like depressives and things. I think Lisa knows more about the world than the other patients and she has a sense she wants to be part of it, but isn’t sure how. In the novel, Lisa says “Lisa never watched tv and had scorn for those who did. She believed it made people like more like robots than they already were.” (Kaysen 21). Lisa seems to understand the condition of the patients in Mclean hospital and how they just drift through life and aren’t sure how to live in the real world. Also Lisa says “It’s a mean world out there. There’s no one to take care of you.” (Kaysen 22). Lisa seems to understand the world more than the other patients in the hospital and how people have to fend for themselves and those who can’t are locked away. Girl, Interrupted is a very moving book exposing the sufferings of people who don’t know what the real world seems like. There is one character, Polly who tried to burn herself and Susanna thinks she is courageous since she never complains, smiles and doesn’t talk, but Polly is like a comforting presence for others. Susanna believes that Polly built herself a new skin of scar tissue that never wears out to cover and protect what is underneath; she burned the sadness out of her. Yet, Polly makes me sad because she like the others is also covering herself, hiding in a world of darkness not really in reality. My teacher (ap world history teacher will be psychology teacher next year) is always asking us to analyze and see point of view. What do you think of my take of the book so far? Also let me know what you think of the book so far, if my words have given you insight into it. Thanks for everything!
I think I got at least an 86 on my algebra 2 honors final. While I arrived at 9 am, I was sitting with a friend in the cafeteria (that’s where the desk attendant told us to wait till 9:20) and I was helping her study for geometry finals. I was surprised I could still remember and understand geometry from 10th grade (I’m in 11th grade) and I was able to help her. I think reiki helps a lot because it was like my subconscious mind was helping me focus on the memories and making me finally understand geometry when at first learning it in 10th grade it was hard for me, but I still got an 82 in geometry honors. Since there were some other juniors and seniors coming in late for final exemptions, the desk attendant didn’t bat an eye when my friend Izzy and I signed in. I was exempt from my gym final, so instead of 7:10 regular school time and waking up at 5:45, I woke up at 8:25 and arrived at school at 9 am and the final began at 9:20. I almost ran out of time on the calculator portion of the final because I took 50 minutes on the non-calculator portion, there was one problem where I had to graph a polynomial function with degree of four and four zeroes and describe increasing and decreasing which took a while and I did bad on. On the non-calculator portion, I spent some time on a synthetic division problem because the answers i got weren’t what the multiple choice questions were, so I ended up picking the closest one. With three minutes to go, I quickly solved two more problems, one on finding the polynomial function using finite differences and another problem on graphing a vertical and horizontal transformation of f(x)=sqrt(x). I think I did bad on the graphing part, but i tried to pick the points as best as possible since I was running out of time. The greatest thing is I feel like my subconscious mind is working with my conscious mind to retain more information so I remembered most of the algebraic and geometric formulas I needed to use. I wish my parents would stop being so critical and telling me I have my head in the clouds. I try to live in the moment and if something is my fault, i accept the blame without complaining. I try to look on the positive side of things and expect things to turn wrong, so I’m prepared for them with a positive attitude. Also after doing some slight meditation, I realize that it has helped me realize that my thoughts sometimes do go far ahead of myself and I tend to over-criticize myself and let others define who I am. I have decide to listen to my heart more and go for my goals. My parents are very criticizing and they told me once that I wouldn’t make the gymnastics team because I couldn’t do a handstand, I ignored them and tried out and I made the team. Now I am on the high balance beam doing tuck jumps and having friends. I was only on the team in 10th grade because now I’m busy with my ap and honors classes. My parents think that I don’t apply myself hard in school even though I’ve gotten good grades, they think my interest in spiritual fulfillment is a distraction to my school work, but I feel it gives me comfort and also helps calm and center me in school. If you have any ideas on how to remain calm when parents criticize you or when they yell that you’re not good enough or complain about their life and how stressed they are and how you don’t know how to survive in life, please give me some advice. I would love to hear your ideas and in the meantime, I am working on building a reiki positive shield so I can filter out negativity.
Thanks, anita;) The weather here in Northeast NJ is cold and windy and though, it is 21 degrees now, it feels like 16 degrees. It may snow late SAturday possibly a foot, but will turn to rain and possible light flooding will occur. I wonder what the weather forecast will do to the SATs, it turns out I just received a phone call, SATs are canceled, but I’m still wondering when they will be rescheduled. Most of the time I try to live in the moment and try not to worry about financial and school pressures and be grateful for friends, but sometimes my parents think I seem ambivalent about money and they rag me about it. I try to look at both the positive and negative sides in life and am mostly a realist. However, sometimes it’s hard when you have college applications to think about next year and especially when your parents keep ragging you about how everything requires money. Although i try really hard in school, it can be hard for me to retain all information because my mind gets sidetracked at times and that’s when my parents think I’m not applying myself hard in school, although my gpa is 97.5. Also there are times when my parents compare me with my brother who is really good at logical thinking, solving complex math problems and has technical mindset and they tell me how they wish I could be more like him, yet I am more like a creative writer and scientist.
Thanks for the support, anita:D I like your idea of thinking about moving like the wind or thinking of trees in the forest, I think that would be a great idea to help me feel more secure, free and balanced. I think I did decent on the ap world history midterms (65 questions which were relatively easy and a comparative essay on how christianity and islam impacted women, i didn’t put the time period in my thesis and could only come up with one difference instead of two, but the overall essay was good and I had decent evidence, the least I think I would get is 4/9) or today which is good because I didn’t finish the Ch. 11 essay yesterday on the changes and continuities of Mongols in 11th-13th century because I was busy planning the timeline and the multiple choice questions (80) were hard. I took the ap english midterms today (jan. 21 at (:15-11:25) and i think I completed 22/40 of the multiple choice questions (skipped 18 because I only had an hour left and I still had the essay to write) and when it came to the essay, during the planning, I only came up with two cons for the essay (it was about whether high schools should form corporate partnerships and use the corporations advertisements to help spread the news about the sports) even though I was supposed to have three pros and three cons. With 40 minutes left, I wrote a good opening paragraph (I didn’t have time to touch up on my vocab, but I tried to do well, it included the theis I was going for the pro side and also the pros and cons) and I got to the second paragraph which I wrote about pros which were that it would encourage school spirit since more people would come if they knew reputable company was advertising and getting the news out and more people coming would mean more fans supporting the players. Another pro is to fundraise for school since by partnering with corporations, the school would attract more people and therefore attain more money for renovating school programs. The cons were the advertisements would distract student from their school works and it can be risky to rely on businesses because they can decline. I was having trouble putting evidence to support my pros in the second paragraph, I couldn’t think of corporations except for Apple and NBC news and was trying to make connections to them and how it would be a positive if high school sports aligned with them to advertise sports. I think I said that if high school sports were to align with Apple and make a negotiation that for every fan who goes to high school game would get 10% off Apple products, then the school would earn more money and more people would buy Apple products, but I’m not sure that was a good example. Anyway with 3 minutes left, I couldn’t think of any examples of how a corporation (specific name of corporation) could sponsor a high school sports game could increase morale of players and how it would help the school in its fundraising. I think i said something about how it would be less money for the school to advertise and that because the company would advertise for them, they didn’t have to worry about spending time getting the word out and also that the word could be spread further. i didn’t get to the cons paragraph because I ran out of time. Anyway, after the ap english midterm, I was just tired and was grateful that one of my friends was around and he and I talked about the exam and comforted each other. He said he didn’t do well on the ap english either, but I think he probably got a 5/9 and I got a 3/9. I have algebra 2 honors finals tomorrow and I hope I do well on that. Also I am nervous about SATs on saturday, but there is supposely a snowstorm coming up so I’m not sure. the guy that I had a strong connection with since seventh grade is worried that I’m being too hard on myself and I’m afraid that I’m losing myself. He seems glad to know I have two guy friends in ap english that help me, but he is also worried because I have a lot on my mind this week. Yet, i’m glad i have friends and support from you guys on tinybuddha, thanks a lot!
Thanks SeaIsland;) There are some days when I’m not sure who I am as a person. It’s like there is a side of me that accepts myself and wants to do well in life and knows where to go and there are other times when I feel numb and empty inside and am not sure whether I should try hard in school. I think the underlying factors behind the stress I have are the idea that I want to be toned and 113 pounds and also the idea that I’m not sure if I can open myself to trust the guy I think I love. There are so many doubts in my mind that I’m inadequate and not smart enough for him and also my parents are very hard on me to do well in school and sometimes they rag me on how I need to work on preparing to manage money and prepare for college. Also, the idea that I have ap midterms, algebra 2 honors finals and SATs all this week (January 21-23). I think that whenever I do well in algebra 2 honors,which I am right now, my ap world history grade suffers, I think it is an 89 now. I am currently afraid that I might not make the grade curve to get into Rowan or Rutgers.
when i was bullied, i held on to wicca because i felt that it was the only left for me to still comfort in, talking to spirit guides and angels helped me get through the worst low self-esteem years in seventh-eighth grade when i thought i was worthless and no one seemed to take me seriously since lots of my classmates thought i was a freak, yet i still held on because i needed some hope to pull through.
anita, i started realizing that i was a wiccan when i was eleven in sixth grade. for most of my life, i never really thought god would allow war or bullying in this world and i never really acknowledged the christian faith of my parents. for most of my life especially from fourth and fifth grade, i’ve been experiencing psychic senses and always felt like there was a spirit world because I would often talk to spirits and angels and at night i would astral project, i didn’t know the terms of my abilities nor that wicca existed when i was that age, but i always felt that no matter what i never fully fit in with my classmate even though at that age, i was just enjoying life and didn’t care. i remember one time when i feel on the fourth grade playground and got a scar on my cheek and i put my hand to it and imagined it healing and i felt a warm, tingling sensation and the scar closed. this intrigued me to dwelve more into the nature of wicca, but i wasn’t sure where to start. my fourth grade teacher was very supportive and said maybe that i should start researching psychic abilities, it was hard to comprehend everything i researched at that time, so i just accepted my abilities and didn’t think much of them until sixth grade. in sixth grade, i was bullied because i was very tomboyish and when one guy called me a witch, i was very offended because i thought it meant i was a freak. yet he was very nice and said that i had an energy around me and since he was a wiccan, he could sense that i had psychic energy around me. i was intrigued and asked him what wicca was and also if it had psychic abilities involved, much to my surprise he said yes and he said he could help me develop my abilities. he also taught me some of the terms like astral projection, psychic healing and also told me of a sight called spellsofmagic.com where i could meet and learn wicca. he told me wicca was more of a spirituality than a religion and focuses on the god and goddess within ourselves and also protecting nature. i had always been fascinated with science and loved being out in nature, so i had a curiosity to learn wicca. when sixth grade ended, he went to another school and i was sad because i was still learning on wicca so i did some research and stumbled upon this site called molochsorcery.com and it taught wicca in lessons, but it was hard to follow. so in seventh grade, i started looking up ways to learn wicca and created an account on spellsofmagic.com to see if i could learn more. when i was 13-15, i didn’t learn much except i still involuntarily astral projected and could psychically heal, but i wanted to learn how to control it. i would search sites and buy books, but not much information. when i turned 16, one of my friends on spellsofmagic.com saw that i was serious in my pursuit of wicca, that i really wanted to know more about divination, astral projection, reiki (energy healing term) and told me that there was a free online school at witchtopia.com. i learned a lot from witchtopia and when i went back to spellsofmagic where i learned the basics and joined a coven there called Divine Essence and I really enjoy that coven, at first when i first started out on spellsofmagic, i went into twisted nether coven which didn’t teach me much, but was mostly a coven for beginners and after witchtopia, ifelt i needed a coven, i could feel like i could belong in. also on witchtopia, i have a coven called temple of dark art. Wicca is mostly a nature based religion where wiccans use the energy of the universe through meditation to channel the energy for their uses mostly for good because wiccans believe that the god and the goddess created us and gave us life and are seen through out nature, so we as wiccans respect them by worshipping nature and honoring them by not doing destructive things like cursing or hexing. A person can be psychic and have a belief in a higher power without being wiccan, in fact everyone is psychic to some level or degree, but a wiccan is someone who does rituals and makes it part of their daily life to honor nature and channel energy to help heal or create positive energy and is tuned to the psychic world as part of her daily life . i enjoy cartomancy (divining with cards) and clairvoyance. So far i am currently 17 and working on reiki, seeing auras and astral travel (i can project, but travel is still hard)
Thanks Juanita, that was very supportive and insightful;)
I think the pain began at the end of fifth grade in June. You could take a few friends to fifth grade celebration and have pictures taken together, but no one wanted to go with me. It was then when I first felt the sting of rejection, but only a little. They said I was too athletic and tomboyish. Over the summer, I decided to quit being athletic and somehow after not practicing for a long time, my athleticism has somewhat faded. However, in 6th grade, there was a girl and a guy who bullied me because I wasn’t athletic enough. In seventh grade, that’s when the pain hit the hardest, I had no friends and a tough algebra class and felt like no one was going to help me. I also got sexually harassed by a guy, making me not as trusting in relationships as I used to be. In eighth grade, I fell in with the wrong female friend and she got me very depressed. I was so desperate for friends, that I tried to be friends with her, but she was very depressed and made me more depressed. Also, in eighth grade, my parents were being overly critical of my wiccan religion saying that I had my head in the clouds. They said that I wasn’t a model student because I enjoyed spending time meditating instead of studying for tests. I got good grades, but they said that since I was almost in high school, I should stop acting and be more serious in life. I love acting because it helps take my mind of things, when I can be someone else, I feel like I can do and be what I want without limitations. Also, when I’m acting, I feel free and I enjoy making people laugh. I’m still a little on the shy side and trust as easily, but I’m getting more courage and building up self-esteem. The first two years of high school have been great and I have lots of friends and no one bullies me. Yet, I still feel insecure about myself at times. There are times when I have moments of clarity and I know what I want in my heart and no one, not even my parents can dissuade me. But at other times, I feel an emptiness and wonder if I’ll ever find fulfillment before I pass away.
anita, I think I let my past failures and what other people say about me fuel the insecurities about myself. I need to learn to love myself. I had dreams to become an ice-skater and get into a class for the medical field, but they were unsuccessful. Also, after failed relationships in seventh grade, I haven’t been as trusting and very shy when it comes to relationships. I don’t show myself as much as I used to. I used to love acting and I still do, but now I don’t feel comfortable being in front of people. I feel like I’m most myself when I’m alone.