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Simon Osborn

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  • #111990

    Simon Osborn
    Participant

    I hope the words were not hurtful, I’ve learn’t through experience that if news is going to hurt, it’s best being told fully at the earliest possible time. With time you will begin to see things differently, how that will go for you I honestly do not know, however there is always light at the end of the tunnel. This is not the end of everything, merely the start of something new, though I can understand that it is very difficult to see it as such, almost impossible.

    It is indeed sad when relationships break down or are changed. I do often think about him and wonder what it would be like if we were still best of friends, though this does not help me, it is what it is, we are both upset with the fact that it happened and how we now feel about each other. That was one of life’s lessons for us.

    I understand that you’re unsure on how to manage the situation, it may be that this is a situation is not one that you can manage, maybe it is one that will unfold in front of you. The key is to accept whatever happens next, change what you can and most importantly do not take anything personally as this is a stage in life. It has not been planned.

    How do you feel today? Have you heard from him or have you tried to make contact? Have any unsuspecting doors opened?

    All the best, Si.

    #111969

    Simon Osborn
    Participant

    I appreciate your reply XenopusTex, I guess it is what it is.

    The quotes are just parts of the text I felt most about when writing, nothing more.

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 3 months ago by  Simon Osborn.
    #111884

    Simon Osborn
    Participant

    Ok Anita, here goes.

    When I was 11, my father started a scuba diving business in Thailand. I, along with My sister (who is two years older than me) and my Mother were all taken along. My father’s vision was for us all to live there for what he saw as the future.

    For me, I was in heaven

    I’ve loved adventure from a young age and have always enjoyed learning about and being part of other cultures, the Thai culture really has left its mark on me, I positively love the people, the country, their whole way of life. It was easy whilst living there, young and unknowingly joyful. I had too many pets to remember, terrapins, a stray dog who I named Foxy, snakes, parrots, stick insects, you name it and I had once enjoyed them. I even had the pleasure of raising a fallen sparrow chick into an adult (on terrapin food), who ended up nesting in an out-cove above my window. It was the greatest, most memorable time of my life. I learnt to scuba dive in Thailand and enjoy the sport now.

    So, two years later I returned to England, my mother brought my sister and I back so that we could receive a proper education. This decision I am very happy about as it has given me skills and knowledge to have the job I currently do, it’s nothing too special though I’ve had numerous promotions which I’ve been pleased with and it pays the bills pretty well.

    I was occasionally bullied which did not fill me with joy as you’d expect, however I knew I was strong, I simply kept going positively.

    In the first year after our return I has returned to school and was forced into ‘options’ that I did not care for, this was due to me returning in year 9 when the others has chosen their subjects at the end of year 8 (whilst I was living in Thailand). The rest of my school days are almost unmemorable. I can remember very few moments. I was occasionally bullied which did not fill me with joy as you’d expect, however I knew I was strong, I simply kept going positively.

    The end of school came, I acquired low GCSE’s as a result of both late return, me being completely uninterested as Thailand had so much more to offer, the bullies and basically a very odd feeling, for a long two years had passed and my father hadn’t been there, at all. Someone who was so close a part of my life, just, vanished.

    I was not told about what had happened until I was around 17, I obviously knew what was going on but no idea why, how. It turned out my father had been getting to know a car sales rep from Thailand. My two step-sisters knew and so gently informed my mother, who did a very good job indeed at keeping her emotions hidden. She had decided to stay in England, a decision that I know broke her heart which she still has trouble with today. She is sad, almost numb because of the past, my cousin recently passed away, he was younger than me, this also had a huge effect on my mother. Recently, over the last year there has been some good improvement, I realize it may not be much but my mother does seem happier 🙂

    So, basically, from the day I started school after our return from Thailand, until today, I have not been able to talk to many people for a long period of time, I enjoy formalities and a chat but rarely have deep conversations, apart from with two of my closest and oldest friends. I find it a struggle to have long discussions with my family, mostly, my Mother, we usually share a dozen questions and answers and that’s pretty much done 🙁

    In the years since our return to England (18 years ago) I have traveled back out to Thailand to see my Dad 6 times I believe (my memory is shocking), if I sat to think about the amount of times I’ve been out to Thailand I could work it out but for the life of me just don’t know off the top of my head. My memories seem very distant and have done so for as long as I can remember. I have a great attention span for things I love, which is odd as I love my family very much, but do not worry about seeing them, only my mother, I worry about not seeing her, and my sister and nephew and niece…

    My first trip back to see him was when I has turned 18 and flew out on my own

    OK, so the gist then is that when I was 13 I returned to England without my father, and basically until I was old enough to fly on my own I didn’t see him. (My first trip back to see him was when I has turned 18 and flew out on my own).

    I don’t know what to make of it all, I’m upset for both sides, my mother as she loved my father deeply and has a huge piece of herself missing, and my father as he wanted my mother to commit to living in Thailand, which she had a hard time coping with as she had two daughters in England who did not want her to leave.

    I currently live with my girlfriend, we have a great partnership, we’re actually waiting on our offer in principle so we can buy a house together. I attended college after high school and studied hard, achieve higher pass marks for English, Math and Science, this enabled me to get a decent first job. Since then I have had 4 jobs, two of which have seen numerous promotions. I am in a stable position in life and am very happy, energetic and ambitious. Have a great positive outlook and actually want to begin photographic journalism into the success of the lives and times of black culture.

    The only issue is, I close down, mostly with my mother, and I go quite quiet with my entire family.

    I could go on and on but am getting to a point where words are just words now, I will write again when I know what it is that may help?
    Maybe you can get somewhere with the story so far! 🙂

    In addition, I am not very close to having kids, though I want them. One of my wishes is that my mother gets to meet them, I feel quite sad realizing this may not happen, I feel like I may be too late.

    -Simon.

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 3 months ago by  Simon Osborn.
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    #111849

    Simon Osborn
    Participant

    The Sight (fictional, Wolves)

    The Book with No Name by Anon (fictional, mystery, multi charter reading)

    The Shack (fictional, spiritual)

    Subliminal: The Revolution of the New Unconscious and What It Teaches Us about Ourselves (non-fictional, mind)

    #111847

    Simon Osborn
    Participant

    You could see if LibreOffice or OpenOffice work on the tablet? 🙂

    #111845

    Simon Osborn
    Participant

    Hi Carly,
    This is somewhat incredible, I had an 8 year relationship with my ex partner though we split up almost 5 years ago if I remember correctly. Her name was also Carly and your story sounds as if I had been on the other end of it.

    Call him, please.

    If I can say anything for my relationship, as soon as I broke up with her I shattered her heart and crushed mine at the same time. I can remember feeling terribly guilty for a good year after breaking up with her, I wanted to speak with her all year and for years after. I didn’t want to completely loose touch though I knew I could hurt her by staying as a friend. I had to leave completely.

    Heartbreak is horrible, if you need to speak with him just go for it. Say everything you need to say and ask anything you want. If he has a backbone he will speak with you, else he doesn’t respect you or is still too hurt.

    -Simon.

    #111840

    Simon Osborn
    Participant

    Good Afternoon 🙂

    I am also new here, since an hour ago! All the best to you, love the quote, Si.

    #111838

    Simon Osborn
    Participant

    ………. 😀

    #111837

    Simon Osborn
    Participant

    Hi Pipercub,
    I’m going to say something that may be hard to come to terms with.

    That fantastic relationship you had before, is not going to come back. Those extras you both had with each other, using your own words, unveiled those parts of your relationship that made it what it was. The parts you didn’t feel, the parts you didn’t know, the parts you had were the right combination and made it the strong friendship it was.

    Your relationship has now changed forever. You are going to need to start realizing it for what it is, with a great deal of work you will start accepting it for the new relationship it is becoming. The future will be different for you both, I am sure his feelings towards you have changed and am also quite sure he wishes that you hadn’t slept together also.

    In terms of having a relationship with him, I doubt now it would even feel the same as the spiritual, physical and emotional parts of it have all changed.

    For now I would try to analyse the situation for what it is.

    I had a rather large argument with a friend of mine who I’d known since I was 6 years old, I am 29 now. The past 4 years of our friendship has been almost non-existent due to this argument. Very sad indeed but it was all that was needed to change our thoughts of each other. We occasionally talk and have arranged to have a few beers with the third musketeer in a few weeks. I am looking forward to it though now in my mind I am meeting an old friend, not my best friend.

    I realize this post is not very helpful though I want it to resonate with you, I feel reading this now will possibly give you an easier ride.

    All the best, Si.

Viewing 9 posts - 1 through 9 (of 9 total)