As I look back, I realize I lost four years to a breakup and the pain that followed. I spent so much time just surviving — chasing the wrong things, without real guidance from my family. It hurts to think about how different things could have been if I’d focused on myself earlier.

I failed the eligibility exam for Assistant Professor because I wasn’t truly studying; I was just trying to get through each day. Now I have the another exam ahead for school teacher, and I can’t prepare for assistant professor alongside it. By the time the next Assistant Professor exam comes, I might not even be eligible to sit for it.

I wish I had known what I wanted, or at least had someone to guide me. It makes me really sad — but I’m still here, learning from it, and maybe that’s where healing starts.I wish i had just studied all these years . I was good in studies but i messed up real bad. The regret is heavy.

Thank u so much.. but what is the practical solution to not feeling like this.. i feel not good enough.. like i have acne.. and every guy i talk to now is so shallow..most of them just want to get me in their bed.idk how else to say it.I don’t feel like talking to any guy. I liked someone a little but then he was not consistent . No efforts. I was pushing myself too. But then i completely left talking to him.. he was sarcastic all the time.. calling my neck small.. i am not very pretty but I don’t think i am ugly as well.. but now i feel ugly.. he said i have bit narrcistic traits..i tried to know if i have..idk now.. i just want someone to be there and i got angry with him because he was all the time making fun of me and praising his female bestfriend who he often told likes him and wanted to marry him.. but then he was like he wants someone from similar profession.. he used to flirt with me but then he was found nowhere for weeks. I honestly don’t care haven’t talked to him for months… My self esteem seems so shaken.. i always keep putting others ahead of me.. last night as well.. i was before someone in the queue to get something but i let someone else take my position and that person took so much time .. where i needed just 3 4 minutes. He was thankless. I feel inferior to even kids.. like they know everything to dress better look better and me.. i know nothing.. i feel like a people pleaser… The more i want to be at peace the more i am not at peace.. I don’t feel like coming out of room as i have acne.. my father abused my ex this diwali too.. i was just having some conversation about let the kids live kind off stuff and he just gave me guilt..like you are making holes in the same plate you are eating in.. indirectly i am using his resources.. i have to get a job soon and have to face interviews but i am so insecure about my looks.. this boy that called me narrcistic also used to make fun of me that my neck is small.. i am mercurial.. i know it is truth.. but i am not mercurial with everyone.. it was him that i felt little connected with but i feel i was not good enough for him too😵‍💫.why does my life revolve around people idk… I need to make money but how do i do it with this life and this mind

I don’t know.. maybe i am feeling this anxious because he is in the town.. idk.. I don’t want to take help as well from these contacts you gave.. nothing will end this pain.. it is here to stay.

Hey , is there anyone i need help.. i have been here earlier as well.idk where to start but i am going through a tough time.. i am struggling with my career as well as relationship. My parents didn’t approve the relationship with him, he left and now after 4 years i am still getting up with pain in the chest.. nothing without him is making sense..I tried talking to many others but this feeling doesn’t go away.. i try to study but then this feeling drowns me for days in a row.. he is not married yet. He is 29 i am 27.my mother asked me to run away with him but he has blocked me 4 years ago saying it would help us. I just can’t forget him. How to not feel this feeling every day and be able to live without him. It’s like i am waiting to die soon. Not voluntarily though. I know it’s not possible for us to be together. How do i be casual about it.Its not that i couldn’t let him go.. i have.. but just I don’t want anyone else… 5th year has started almost and nothing has changed..this feeling has died in me.. i am anxious as i write this.. i need stable mind to perform in exams but i m struggling

Thanks for being there during my tough time…. I am towards healing.. happier and content without him.. something that felt is impossible to overcome ….. I am working towards achieving my goals and bettering myself…. to anyone going through heartbreaks.. just hang in there.. you’ll get the courage to overcome. Do not fight for someone who is okay with loosing you.. the world is big .. there are plenty of fishes in the sea .. but first work on yourself. 🌻

Thanks again ma’am.:)

Sending you love 💝

I don’t see any solution to this.I do have options to date people and everything but my heart is closed .even when i talk to others i keep thinking of him.nd i know this will not end.

Hi ma’am..thanks for asking.I am better.I have left talking about him at home.More or less i have realised this too he didn’t put any efforts to keep this relationship.He says i am with you but his actions tell something else.I am focussing on myself and my career.I am letting go of this relationship at present and idk what I’ll decide in future when he asks me about it but at present I don’t have the power to fight for it maybe in future I will have.. but i am leaving that for future. I am relieved and not depressed anymore.I believe this phase is over for me now. I’ll be shifting to his hometown for further studies but there will be no contact and I’ll be okay. I am sure.

Thanks a ton for your concern. I read stories of many here and realised I am not the only one going through it.🙃

My mother all the time says you were definitely our enemy in past life that came to ruin our life.i was better without a child like you.i gave you everything which she certainly did and you have me that chamar boy.this just has torn my soul.i do not recognise myself anymore.