Thank you so much Eliana for your response, and I also believe everything happens for a reason. You are so right, the should have and could haves we’re playing in my head for so long, but I find that I am slowly but surely escaping that thought pattern.  God has the path for me charted out, I may not understand it right now, but everything will come together I know it will.  That visualization technique is great! Thank you, I find that my thoughts can stray if I’m not careful. I’ve also been reading a lot and trying to staying the present as much as possible. I have also been distraction by National Write Month, if you’re into writing you should definitely check it out. 🙂 I’m about to start a new job so that has invigorated me, and I’m making plans to travel, and who knows who I will meet along the way…I’m kind of feeling excitement again :-).

That definitely makes sense Poppyxo :-), I know the signs now, it’s up to me to respond to them and make the best choices for myself along the way. I can’t ignore the signs again and I won’t. I want a solid relationship and I think the initial period of meeting someone is definitely vital in spotting those red flags. Yes, we can’t control other peoples actions ( I really had to think about this one for awhile lol) Just our own responses to their actions. I am also reading a book called “The Four Doors”, it’s been eye opening and I’m enjoying the perspectives. I have a tiny book stack forming on my desk now lol.  Thank you for giving me awesome relationship goals, I know that I have some work to do before I’m ready for a relationship, but who knows someone might just come out of nowhere haha.

That was incredibly insightful Anita, I thought about it and asked the questions, what am I really trying to catch up to? In reality there’s nothing to catch up to, I am taking a path that is my own, and I want to do it the right way and continue to heal and grow throughout my life as we all are.  That gave me a lot of good perspective on points that I had put myself down on.

Wow Poppyxo, are stories are very similar, thank you so much for sharing yours with me. I can relate on so many levels. It’s amazing how much I ignored his bad traits, because I believed in us so much. I thought he was the one too, because he was the only  “one” I had encountered who made me feel safe and loved. I think that’s why his actions at the end were so surprising, he had always believed in us or so I thought.  My heart does yearn to love someone, but I have plenty of precautions. I am trying to accept the fact that there’s a possibility of get hurt again, but if the next time happens hopefully I will be a stronger individual.

Interview yes haha, I won’t settle again. I forced myself to look past any issues because he was there for me. This post has given me hope that I can perhaps find someone with all the qualities I look for in a partner and who will accept my questions and anxiety with open arms.  Nope I wouldn’t buy something I didn’t like, it’s amazing how we yearn  for someone that was bad for us, but the door to healing is always open and I choose to take that leap. Thank you so much for these book recommendations! I’m an avid reader how did you haha, so excited for your relationship, enjoy every moment.