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tidalwave

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 48 total)
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  • #223621
    tidalwave
    Participant

    Hi Anita

    long time no see

    just wanted to tell u.

    i feel much better the past days .

    I met someone else and the pain that i had before just went away. Not right away , but pretty fast. I finally got to know that there can be something better for me than him.

    Best wishes

     

    • This reply was modified 5 years, 7 months ago by tidalwave.
    #217487
    tidalwave
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    In that post I misspelled myself and corrected afterwards – I can’t tell…

    i guess I just can’t accept the fact that I am not still over him after a year and he might moved on  a long time ago. I feel stupid.

    #217485
    tidalwave
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    I actually lisp spelled this sentence and corrected myself afterwards – I can’t tell…

    i guess I just can’t believe this ended so fast and stupid. Though it was me who ended it I hate it that I can’t eat over it so fast… i just can’t stand the feeling that he might got over it all very fast and doesn’t think about me at all… i feel stupid…

    #217301
    tidalwave
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    I feel sorry for his situation. And that’s eating me up that i can’t just ask him how he is doing, talk to him, make him feel better. It shouldn’t end like this. We didn’t say goodbye on a good note. I miss him.

    #217099
    tidalwave
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    i wrote him that I’m planning to come in summer, but wasn’t there yet. I didn’t tell him when I’ll come , but I wrote him when I’m planning to go back…

    he doesn’t know exactly that I’m now here, but he could think of that . Cause I wrote him that I aoll go back in the end of the month…

    I don’t know if that’s good or not. I just feel like we didn’t put a point in this relationship and that’s eating me up.

    #216783
    tidalwave
    Participant

    dear Anita

    he is still in my hometown , I am in my hometown too. But I am not writing him anything, because he seems like he doesn’t really want to meet.

    i think this way because he didn’t reply to my last message, that “maybe we could eventually meet. And I have a feeling, that maybe he asked this because he doesn’t want to bump into me or my parents accidentally.

    I am kinda confused what to do. I believe it would be better to meet and to clarify things. But if he is not interested in that…

    Summer came and the feelings are fading away. Slowly… I don’t have that much patience anymore.

     

    W

    • This reply was modified 5 years, 8 months ago by tidalwave.
    #216659
    tidalwave
    Participant

    Hi Anita,

    So I decided to not write him anything. But week ago he wrote me. And he asked me where am I at the moment. If I am back home or outside the country. So I wrote him that about my plans about coming home for summer. And he said to me that he is eventually right now in my hometown, where he doesn’t live. And he didn’t clearly reply why he is there. He just said “ some my business “ . After that I wrote him that we could eventually meet. But he didn’t reply. So this is weird. And I don’t understand why would he even write me. But I’m glad I could ask him how he is doing, though he answered with one sentence.

     

    #212943
    tidalwave
    Participant

    But what would you advice me, as someone, who had problems like this?

    Sometimes I just don’t want to raise my voice, because I hate, when people always thinks, how important their opinion is. But at the other side, I understand , that it is actually important to say whats on your mind. Because that will show who you are.

    #212929
    tidalwave
    Participant

    No, its also from last year.

    #212883
    tidalwave
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    I accidentally reported one of my posts.  I wanted to refer to it, but clicked on the wrong button .
    It is called Virtual communication anxiety . I am talking about that anxiety problem there.

     

    #212791
    tidalwave
    Participant

    How did you get through this? Why did you have this problem?

    #212785
    tidalwave
    Participant

    I guess that, what you described now, is the real problem of mine. This not activeness, just observing. Because now I have this tendency too. I get tired of being active so quickly so I go to this mode.

    That is why i get in these kind of situations. Honestly, I feel disgusted about it. I hate being like this .

    #212765
    tidalwave
    Participant

    I think one thing I’ve learned from this situation is how complicated we are. There are no standard packs of personalities. It is always a enormously big field of traits, different situations , genes, and surroundings that build us as people. I imagine how hard it is to advice something, you didn’t experience to live personally. Its even pretty impossible to get the whole image for a complete stranger. I am wondering how you deal with it. But thank you.

    #212763
    tidalwave
    Participant

    Sorry to confuse you.  I am confused myself, this situation was pretty unusual to me. But i am trying to tell you as much as possible.
    How different do you see this situation now? And do you think, I should write him now, after hearing all that?

    #212755
    tidalwave
    Participant

    About talking.
    My problem with talking was back in my teens. Over-analyzing,  self-consciousness.  This time with him I just fell back into this pattern, which I had. Because it was a kind of self-defense instinct I had before.  As much I am analyzing it, I see in what way it was different.

    First time we met I felt pretty weird because I wasn’t in relationship before. But I saw that it was escalating pretty quickly.  What I noticed that day, that I just couldn’t imagine myself in this situation before.It was exciting so I went into a “viewer mode” . I didn’t talk much, just observing this situation from a “bird view”, like it was not happening to me. That was weird indeed.

    When he came to my town , we’ve talked normally (much better) , as I wrote before, I could tell him really deep things because I felt no walls around us anymore (somehow).

    But this “he often wanted to hear what I feel, and what I think about doing next. And I just was silent. And said nothing… I couldn’t talk. The anxiety was so overwhelming that I just remained silent all the freaking time” was different.

    He asked me all the time “What is next” . It was about the relationship we started. He wanted us to be together, me to stay there. But it was like he wanted me to decide what I am going to do right in the moment.  And so I became silent again. After this he actually apologized, telling me that it was to much pressure.

    • This reply was modified 5 years, 9 months ago by tidalwave.
Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 48 total)