Sid,

I can feel your anger. Lets see if you behaved correctly in your situation. Lets break the story down piece by piece, zoom out a little and see ourselves. I am sure you will feel better. Lets do it together. But before we go ahead and do the analysis, first let me ask you a question. Do you fundamentally believe in taking bitter tasting medicine to treat your illness? Bitter tasting medicine should go inside your body. Well, who likes bitter tasting medicine. Hell no, nobody, at least I don’t like it. I don’t like it when I am sick, have fever, cold, running nose etc. yakk.. who likes it. Nobody! Nobody! Nobody! Well don’t think anything at this point. Don’t try to apply answer to this question to your life so quickly.

Lets start.
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You loved a girl. It was true. Girl kept you as a back up and rejected at first. I can understand that any guy would feel dejected at rejection. You had your bad time, ‘that’ feeling. I understand. .
Well, in this part, you did not do anything wrong. In fact, you loved the girl truly. You were faithful. You were right about feelings you had, whether those originated from love at first or from being rejected later. You were right, Godly at heart.

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She came back to you! Sid, she came back to YOU. YOU! She realized you were the one kept showing what the true qualities of a partner are, that’s why she came to you. She might have literally told you that you were a back up for her(which is totally un-Godly, isn’t it?). But remember, you were still right. You said NO to her. Yes, YOU said no to her. You decided and told her that thats not how people should get married. You were right Sid. You took correct actions.

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Now lets see what to do about feelings you still tend to have for her. Well these feelings were your sicknesses, illnesses. Note that I used ‘were’. Why, because you have already taken that bitter tasting medicine my friend. It is bitter. You wont like it. But always keep in mind that you have taken a Godly decision. A decision that will truly take you near God. Because you did right things all along. You did not hurt her, you were faithful, you said no to her later on. I dont see anything wrong done on your part at all. And best thing I see is that you said NO to her.

Now I am copying some earlier lines again.
…Girl kept you as a back up and rejected at first… This is when you fell sick.
…You said NO to her… This is were you took the medicine. Perfect action. Now just wait for medicine to take effect.

I understand that ‘those’ thoughts will not vanish over the night, but remember that you have already consumed bitter medicine and it is making you healthy gradually. Think about your decision of saying NO to her whenever you feel bad. Because that was the best thing which could have happened to you. God is watching you and gave you wisdom of saying no to the girl. Never forget it. Well, the medicine will take its time. Appreciate it as well.