It seems like your wife is not happy with you and that you could not make her happy. Her circumstances, not being happy and not being in love with you, pushed her into the arms of someone else. You write she was living a fake life with you for the last 10 years, that is very sad.
I think it is time to give her her “real” life back (which is not really in your hands, you only can let her go and its up to her to stop living a fake life) and it is time for you to start to be happy again. You are going through a hard time. The worst you ever could imagine happened to you. You are at the lowest point in your life.

I know what I say now might upset you but STOP being the victim.

Take over the responsibility for the situation. Stop fighting it! What you resist you strength. I know that you suffer and that you are soooo sad about everything, but please
try to accept the situation and accept your suffering and sadness as well, because this is part of it all. When you can accept that your wife is with someone else and that she cheated on you, it will help to pass this hard time much quicker. To come out of it much sooner. Of course you can decide to go the llooonnnnggg destructive way.
Its up to you.

Try to see yourself with the eyes of your wife right now, she looses the rest of respect she still has for you.
Stand up, be strong!

I feel you are a man with a very big heart and even you can not imagine right now that this is possible, I see you veeerrryyyyy hhaapppyyy with a wonderful woman on your side. She looks up to you with a smile. She loves you and she is very proud of you. With her you can be yourself, you dont have to pretend to be something you are not. I see a wonderful path in front of you. You have lovely guides around you.

Please don’t be afraid to do the next important step, which should be talking with your wife without blaming her. Try to find a way to separate with her in a good way.
Try to close that circle with her in love and not in anger. One day she will realize what she has lost!

Be grateful for this big exercise and the possibility to grow!

I wish you all the best and the strength to stand up and take over your life again.
Lots of Love