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Tony

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  • in reply to: Emotional Manipulation #64001
    Tony
    Participant

    Thank you Matt. I suspect you are right. That romantic side must have much ego to feel so hurt. However I have been feeling much better than I thought I would. I’m doing my best to accept as they are right now. I did my best and that’s all I can ask of myself. Learning to love is well is not easy!

    in reply to: Emotional Manipulation #63956
    Tony
    Participant

    Thank you so much for the responses. It’s my first post and already I can see how great this community is.

    I also agree with Cinamon Steva. I was recently in a ‘relationship’ with someone who made me feel that my feelings were never warranted and that I shouldn’t feel a certain way. I was so blind to it initially because of my overwhelming feelings for her and because she was going through a difficult time, I showed her compassion and treated her in the way which I would want to be treated if I was in the same situation.

    Looking back, I feel like I’ve been used and abandoned. I’ve always been open and honest with my feelings but as soon as I spoke about how I felt to her I’d be shut down and now we are not longer in touch with each other. She has decided its best we don’t see each other anymore. Respecting her wishes, I have agreed.

    I now feel resentful to both her and myself. I’m frustrated at myself for not recognizing I was being emotionally manipulated earlier. She says I’m frustrated because I have expectations and have an ulterior motive. This really hurt me, however I know who I am, and I know I’ve never given love with the expectation of getting something in return. I don’t think her actions are intentionally there to hurt me, but I’ve been let down time and time again and when I speak up about feeling let down, I’m told we’re not ‘dating’.

    I wanted to develop more of a relationship with her, however it became too exhausting and detrimental to both of us in the end so I will not look back and try salvaging anything. I feel sad and disappointed at the loss of something which I hoped could potentially be special and fulfilling for both of us. I am getting over it slowly.. I’ve been reflecting and trying to learn and grow from this experience.

    Thanks for all the responses.

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