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John

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  • #118418
    John
    Participant

    To get organized for the work week, get your foo in order.

    First, establish a backup cupboard. In your closet, basement, laundry room. The idea is to have a couple 2 liter bottles of diet coke, cans of soup, box of crackers, bars of soap. So when you run out of these in your main pantry because your miscalculated in your mind how much you had left, you do not have to go out to the store in the middle of the night.

    Secondly, stock up. It saves trips to the store, is forced savings and is prepping. Over buying will eventually save you a trip to the store. You do your main buying on your schedule, not at the mercy of fate, like on Saturday afternoon when Walmart is packed.

    Third go to Walmart when its dead there. Eat before going and have a large block of time for shopping. Hang out there. Slowly cruise the aisles looking at the merchandise, pick up that extension cord, bottle of mustard, deluxe paper napkins. A pair of pliers, a light bulb, needful things.

    Fourth, keep a shopping booklet/list on you. When you need an item, put it on the list. My list is predominately Walmart stuff but can include a Home Depot item. The point is, you have what you need listed and on you so you do not forget.

    Look at it this way, there are various levels of buying. Cheapest it Costco/Sams Club water,paper towels, dog food, mouth wash. If you cannot get it there, you move up in price to Walmart. Canned goods, etc. Some meat and produce.Then you move to main stream grocery store. Produce,meat, etc. And Home Depot or Lowes. More high end stuff and specialty. Finally ACE Hardware for the specialty stuff. Bed,Bath and Beyond. Its just a general model for buying.

    Have two bank accounts. Two debit cards. Only allow one to be drafted by on line type companies. With the second secured bank account with no one’s fingers in it, you can always get gas, etc. in a pinch.

    Have a smart phone? Set up those bank account apps. You can check your balance.

    Have a big to do list. Go over it daily. Update it weekly. Put stars in front of hot items.
    Make it action oriented, first step. Like: Measure for door mat, load broken clock to return, find oil change coupon.

    Have a partner. You go to their house for an afternoon to do stuff and then they come to your house for an afternoon to do stuff.

    #118402
    John
    Participant

    I think the neighbor is screwing his step daughter.The two live there alone. But he is a biker and I’m afraid to do anything. Something just doesn’t seem right.

    #118399
    John
    Participant

    I am seeing a very liberal woman with a 13 year old girl. When Bill Clinto was dealing with Monica he said that Blow Jobs were not sex. Remember. Well this girl had found that clip on You Tube and the girl loves Bill Clinton. So the girl bought the argument hook line and sinker. She gives blow jobs to her boy friends. This goes on relentless ly. Her mother had tried talking with her but the girl sees nothing wrong with it.

    #118397
    John
    Participant

    have 33 years lan in NA. I know how to get people clean. But now Drug Court is the source of all of our newcomers. Drug Court puts them on antidepressants and tells them how to work the NA program. Its impossible to work with these people as they are listening to Drug Court as it has the power to send them to prison.

    Its really frustrating. I have tried to work with them but with no luck.

    And none of them ever make it. Drug Court is a seth sentence. Oh yea, a few make it for a year or more but never long term. Not one.

    #118388
    John
    Participant

    For me sex can be love. i’ve been seeing a lady for a long time that has no interest in sex. I try to accept it. But an old girlfriend emailed. Guys like sex. Sorry. Guilty as charged. Its not like it hurts, is it?

    So then why were men wired this way? To mate annually to procreate and be miserable the rest of the year.

    Did the creator drop the ball here?

    #118385
    John
    Participant

    I’m an old EST graduate. I recently took the training again, and its essentially the same. Changed my life. For the better. Quit drugs.

    #118384
    John
    Participant

    I have been clean since my first NA meeting in 1983. A lot of people will disagree with what I have to say here, but its true. The key to getting and staying sober is massive amounts of meetings. I went to 3 a day the first ten years. Now I go to about 10 a week. I just see that correlation.

    But you gotta make it like going to the club. You gotta get involved with individuals there. Take them a cookie, loan them a book, flatter them. Make some anchor friends that you will look forward to seeing there. Make it fun.

    I go to various halls and lots of their events. I take donuts and laugh it up with the guys.

    Its my home away from home. And this works absolutely. Start watching the guys with 20 years. They come every day. But you are new, you need several times a day.

    And if you do that, the old-timers will see that you are serious and buddy up to you.

    You can do it once or keep screwing around.

    There is never time to do it right, but there is always time to do it over, goes the old saying.

    #118383
    John
    Participant

    Men Are From Mars author John Gray explains that women go up and down and men go in and out. That is, women have highs and lows. Men move in to check out a woman and then withdraw to ponder if they want to get serious or not. Its part of the process.

    On line dating is problematic. Its not real and attracts creeps.

    If you seriously want a man, put on a dress and sit at Starbucks form say 3 to 4 every day. Read a book on say sewing. The interested men will know that you will be there and you look like dear old mom and will take the bait. I’m just saying one method. Men are an endangered species in America. I have given up on it. But if you want ti, lots of good men are out there. Lots. Very good men. Steady stable score men. But they work and don’t cruise the internet all the time.

    Men want a sandwich and a blow job. And they are happy. To them, this is love, relationship and as good as it gets. Perhaps watch a movie together and go to a game together. We are loyal to a fault if cared for. We like dresses, nylons and heels. So crucify us. We cannot help it. We love submissive and then you can have the Escalade. We see the world slipping away. Crooked politicians, open borders with drugs flowing thru and America slipping. We are freaked out and want the old days. Dresses, nylons and heels and just a bit of respect. For that you can have all we have.

    Don’t listen to me, ask your brother if its true. Ask your very best male friend.

    Or you can continue to get creeps off the internet. Its your call.

    I was seeing a girl and she had no idea of how to care for a man. She ordered for me at dinner and wore old clothes when we went to Ruths Chris Steak House. I just couldn’t take it any more.

    #118381
    John
    Participant

    First read Getting Things Done by David Allen, then read it again.

    Secondly get a Daytimer or Franklin planner.

    Third, start using the planner.

    Fourth, always go out for lunch, as it clears your head.

    Fifth, get a mentor to get feedback.

    Sixth, go away on the weekends.This gives perspective.

    #118379
    John
    Participant

    I note books that are mentioned in seminars and write them in my Daytimer. Then I get them from Amazon. It is better to buy 10 books and find one is life changing than to not get that book. That is the price you pay for knowledge. As we get older, knowledge is harder to glean for we have learned the easy stuff already. The remaining knowledge come as a higher cost. Mistakes, lots of bad books to find the good one, expensive courses and lots of research.

    Probably a book store is not the best place to buy a book. Most of my book are very specialized. My favorites.

    Getting Things Done David Allen

    Patriots James Wetly Rawles

    Any Survival Book

    #118378
    John
    Participant

    I am a rancher and work on the fences a lot. I have to ride to the back side every week to go thru the fences. I camp out for several nights. I take a pack mule and cook my food. Its a time to slow down. My cell does not work back there.I take a book and do some carving. I take my dogs. I like stopping for lunch, it feels like I earned it. I am always glad to get home to a hot shower and Netflix.

    Something about the rhythm. The work progress. The old tools and the presence of the dogs. My late wife would always go and we made love under the stars. I think of her a lot when I an there. I was dominate and she was submissive. I was her hero. She was my love. We never had an argument. You can’t replace that. So I live a different life now. No sex and no loving.

    I like things that work. Good saddles, strong rope, old tools, good gloves and heavy jeans. I like good food and a campfire. I like to have dogs with me. And a good horse is a blessing. I think the old west cowboys got it right. Honesty and integrity. Simplicity.

    #118377
    John
    Participant

    It seems to be different. Little personal integrity. So I try to be impeccably honest and fair. It is a game for me. I show up on time, pay in full with a smile and support people. Occasionally some one comments about it.

    I try to go slower and plan less. I try to be more intentional. I relish the small blessings in life. It work to stay in the moment. I get there earlier. I drive slower and come to full and complete stops.

    I talk less and listen more. I try to spend time with easy going people. I stay off the internet except for one time a day.

    I make gratitude lists and make note of more unfortunate people’s plights.

    I am especially grateful for my waterproof Timberland boots, Swiss Champ army knife, Toyota car, Blue Healer, frig full of bottled water and new tires. Life is made easier by my iPhone 6SPlus with the plug (superior to the 7), a big mag lite, Netflix, plenty of folded cotton handkerchiefs and an old quilt to sleep under(they breath).

    I have a friend with a mechanic shop who is very spiritual and we often have lunch. Every fall I leave the ranch and go to San Francisco and buy supplies. I get rope from marine stores, cheese from Sonoma, black ceronni olives from Vallergas in napa, new bedding at Nordstroms, a new big bathrobe, some flannel shirts and jackets. It is a rite of passage for the old year.

    Life can be good even though you are widowed. Good wives cannot be replaced. It is a waste of time to try. Better to have the memories and a good dog.

    I spend a lot of time in the Amish community and have backed away from the grid a lot. Not all the way, but a lot. I read more and put together puzzles.

    Things are very good here. Peace reigns and I like it.

Viewing 12 posts - 1 through 12 (of 12 total)