Hi Prudence,

First, I think its important to understand that you’re not the only person that struggles with finding or maintaining a mate. That doesn’t even account for the quality of that relationship. Understand that relationships are a form of art, and that art will speak to you differently based on your situation, experience, and story. Most people struggle with this, so if you’re feeling frustrated, know that it is super common.

What’s more important than that perspective is in understanding which relationship should be your priority. I’m talking about the longest and the one with the highest potential of fulfillment. I’m talking about the relationship you have with yourself. Getting to know your wants, needs, values, and beliefs are some of the deepest conversations you can have. Those people that know that side of themselves and are comfortable with those sometimes difficult conversations tend to be the safest people to be around. Make getting to know yourself a priority.

This leads to the last point I want to bring up, we attract into our lives that which we are ready for. I think you’re looking at the finish line rather than the journey. Some of my most fulfilling relationships took a long time to form, and the serendipity intertwined with each of them makes the relationships all the more special. Life unfolds at its own speed. Our job is to be aware and open to the opportunities that come our way.

Stay strong.