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wnishin

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  • February 25, 2021 at 3:34 pm #375224
    wnishin
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    The drums are silent because nobody is practicing the old ways / traditions.

    February 19, 2021 at 6:26 pm #374968
    wnishin
    Participant

    We all have beliefs, I’ve always felt if you did right by others and your heart was in the right place everything is going to be just fine. I’ve seen a lot of religious conflict within my family, who’s right? They all are!

    I once caught some Holy Ghost, it felt good to sing but not so much the praise. I have a hard time submitting to organized religion, Christianity. I have a hard time believing sin simply washes away.  My Uncle Mike found Christ, he used to drive his van to hell and back, picking up all the neighborhood kids, red, brown, white, yellow, we all waited at the end of our driveways, young minds, the new sheep, eagerly waiting to fill out the aging flock.

    I’ve been to a dozen churches in my life, and only one had a pastor that could lift a spirit to the sky. When family falls to sickness, addiction, whatever darkness this world throws at the heart, this man brings his book and the belief that anybody can be saved.

    When Mike lost his boys in a car accident, he lost his way, and walked again with the word, I remember this pastor sitting at the hospital for three days, while Scott went through surgery after surgery, the hardest thing, the brutal truth, was they were so busy stopping the internal wounds, they didn’t realize his brain was dead, this man year after year was there, long after any of us ever stepped foot in his church or even gave him a dime, because of his actions I believed in something divine.

    When my Grandma passed away the Medicine man gave his speech, there was drums and singing. I remember this row of little white haired ladies in the front, and how the Medicine man kept saying white man’s Jesus, generations of blood was spilled and this white man’s Jesus was a myth, if you tried to grab him you’d only have empty hands, he wasn’t real, nothing more than a justification to suppress a culture. (Not my words, but I was witness).

    The Creator gave us the sky, mountains, trees, the earth we walk on. Things you can hold in your hands, Creator didn’t need a book, he gives you things you can touch, see, and feel. The little old ladies in the front row looked as if the Medicine man was going to reap their eternal souls, and in this time of sadness I smiled, the woman I loved like a Mother, resting in a casket and I smiled, because I felt her smiling in the sky, and thought this is one heck of a show, and Grandma wouldn’t have wanted to pass any other way.

    When my Mom passed from cancer, there was two sermons, a pastor and medicine man (in fact the two from above if you can imagine), after words, the pastor walked me around the church, it had changed, but this man still remembered me, it had been over a decade since I stepped foot in the building, his hand on my back, his wife’s eyes lighting up, proud to see the little trouble making Indian kid, grew up into a man. We talked and not once did he question any beliefs, or force any issues, in fact he was open to the fact I believe that all religions lead to the same being, there is just different names, it’s good for our spirit to believe, after all we humans have minds, and what kind of being would create such a thing, not to have them ask questions.

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 10 months ago by wnishin.
    February 19, 2021 at 5:55 pm #374967
    wnishin
    Participant

    In leading a team, or being a part of one I look to finding the gift within then occurrence, what have I learned? And how can I rebuild the process or future customer relationship in such a way that because the occurrence happened, we as a team or leader of a team, or organization are ultimately better because the event happened.

    I once had a boss ask if I was afraid of him, early on, it was in a new leadership role and I remember telling him that I will be harder on myself than he could ever be. I also learned that being optimistic is a weapon that is hard to defuse, and whenever a system is under strain you start to see the fracture, it’s like lowering a river you start seeing the rocks and fish for the first time. Keep alert to what the surroundings are telling you.

    We are all humans, and the bigger the project or role, the bigger the stress and potential to displease others, and sometimes even ourselves.

    There has been times that I’ve felt strain at work, but I’ve always found my strength in my team, and sometimes on my drive to work I make a fist when I doubt myself and I hold my head high because people look to me for answers and at the end of the day all I can do is attempt to bring my best self.

    My releases outside of work are listening to music, spending time with my kids, making my wife laugh or when it’s not winter riding a Harley just to smell the grass as it’s freshly cut and counting the big red barns that are getting harder to find across the country side. I know to keep these things in my life I’m going to have to fight, and I tend to look at the brighter side of life.

    It wasn’t always that way, I was raised by two very strong women, and my father was a horny tax accountant that wandered to close to the Indian Reservation. My stories growing up with him are few because of the aforementioned women (mother and grandmother) kept me safe, and we didn’t see eye to eye but there was a time I’d be so nervous around him I couldn’t even tie my shoes, in fact one time as we were heading to church (it’s ironic he was heading to church of all places and I’ll never forget this), that he kept slapping me because I couldn’t tie my shoes, and I sat in a chair while he loaded up his new family and went to church. It wasn’t that I couldn’t tie my shoes at eight years of age, it was I gave him way too much concern, more than he ever deserved. I forgave him you know; it was this great weight off my shoulders.

    I’m sharing this for a reason, I know it can be hard, I’ve had those moments too, but everyday is a fight to be at our best selves and no project, no person or task should ever slow us down (or keep us from tying our shoes).

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